and so it begins again

ahem...

I'm back.

We've begun once again the 40-day journey known as Lent. 'Tis a season for giving up. 'Tis a season for giving back. 'Tis a season for removing. 'Tis a season for reattaching.

So I'm reattaching to this here blog-thing again. Throwing out my thoughts. Spending time actually looking/listening to my life, to see/hear what I've been missing because I've been too busy to stop and be silent.

I'm sure I'll be a bit rusty here at first. Hopefully practice will make, if not perfect, then more interesting reading at the very least. I have no agenda, nothing specific I want to write about. These aren't meant to be Lenten thoughts, though I'm sure they'll creep in. My focus is on the discipline of writing. I just need to write, to rebuild those muscles I've let atrophy lately. All that to say: it might be best to lower your expectations.

As for Lent, I feared I would not find an Ash Wednesday service to attend. However, I remembered Christ Church Cathedral downtown usually did a 6:00 service, right about 5:35. Made it just in time. Good to go through the ritual, to listen to the words. Was struck by the phrase, "rend your heart" in the Joel 2 passage. Something to chew on over the next few weeks. The officiant seemed to bend over backwards to make his sermon as joyful and happy as possible. Like he was embarrassed the season called for penance or any searching of our souls. Heaven forbid we ask people to spend any time pondering less than happy thoughts.

Anyway, might as well answer the question on everyone's mind: what did I give up for Lent. Struggled a bit this year figuring out what God would have me sacrifice. Several friends gave me ideas, which I considered, some much more than others. I've done so many different fasts for Lent it becomes increasingly difficult not to repeat myself. I've given up my usual, chocolate. But I've also decided to give up listening to music on the way to and from work. I know, I know, sounds lame, but that's 50 minutes of silence I'll be adding to my day. Thought about giving up music altogether, but I did that a couple years ago and, so, I wanted to vary it a bit.

And obviously, I've added this bit of discipline to my life as well - you know, the writing of my thoughts in a blog. The plan is to write for 30 minutes, come rain or shine. We'll see how it goes. Depends on how focused I am how long that will end up being. Why do it in public like this? More of a chance I'll stick to it if I know people are reading. Too easy in a personal journal just to, you know, skip a day or two. Feel free to hold me accountable.

OK, I should be moving to bed (how I wish I could have given up my insomnia for Lent. Actually, I have a whole list of things I wish I could have given up for Lent, but that's a discussion for another time. Perhaps). Feel free to comment - just as I'll feel free to engage you in a discussion or not. Don't take it personally if I don't respond. Like I said, it's not really about what is said but the fact that I'm saying it at all.

Faretheewell.

Æ