about this time 20 years ago i was graduating from high school. i don't remember much about the ceremony other than it was polite compared to others i'd been to and moved relatively quickly. i have no idea who i sat next to. i don't recollect who spoke. i know i wore a grey robe, but only because i have pictures. i'm sure i wore red socks, since they were my trademark, much like being barefoot would mark me as i got older. my friend steve was valedictorian - i knew him all my life and knew early on he was smarter than me. or at least more diligent in his studies. my friend amy sang a song she wrote for our class, but that's all i've got. for a rite of passage, i don't have much.
ironically enough, many of my fellow classmates are gathering tonight at bar in dayton to celebrate our 20th reunion. initially, i planned to go - i mean, come on, it's my 20th. how often does that happen? and enough time had passed to see how people had changed. but somewhere in the process i lost my desire to go. maybe i didn't care to see how people had changed. maybe i worried about what people would think of how i'd changed. maybe i saw the list of people attending and realized these were not the people i shared my high school memories with. maybe it was the abhorrent grammar and spelling in the far too numerous reminders. but here i sit instead, at home, writing about my graduation day instead of celebrating it.
unlike many people, i enjoyed my high school years. sure there was the normal drama, especially with my wonderfully cheery and optimistic personality. but school wasn't a drudgery for me. of course, perhaps it helps that i remember so little about my time in school. i remember band. i remember show choir. i remember drama club. i remember muse machine. my classes? not so much. not sure if i've just blocked it to spare myself the trauma of the time. only therapy could tell.
they - you know, people who are asked to speak at commencement exercises and the like - they tell you the friends you make in high school eventually fade away and it's the friends you make in college that are the ones that stick. i wish i could prove that adage false, but i only keep in touch with a handful of friends from high school and that only sporadically. scott. steve. amy. i wonder about some. gabe. paul. donnie. deron. but not enough to go searching.
most times high school seems like something that happened to someone else, a tale told in third person. and maybe that's why i'm not drinking with everyone else at gambits tonight - i'd be trying to live someone else's story, trying to connect with people i only know second hand. i know for some, their reunion provided a moment of clarity, a reconnection to who they were. maybe i missed my chance. guess i'll never know. i'll end up like iona's friend in pretty in pink: i'll get this terrible feeling something is missing. i'll check my pockets, i'll check my keys, i'll count my cds and then realize nothing is missing. it's all just a side effect of skipping my reunion.
i should go flip through my old yearbooks, find those pictures, throw in some music from that time (ooh, stryper! INXS!), get a little nostalgia overload. it's the perfect night for it - skies full of thunderstorms, ghosts of the past flitting through my thoughts, just the slightest twinge of what might have been. better than wasting time here in cyberspace...Æ
----------------
Now playing: Teenage Fanclub - Everything Flows
via FoxyTunes
ps seriously, these are the lyrics for the above song. gotta love itunes on random.
We get older every year
But you don't change
Or I don't notice you're changing
I think about it every day
But only for a little while
And then I feel it
I'll never know which way to flow
Set a course that I don't know
I'll never know which way to flow
Set a course that I don't know
The wind's blowing in my face
Lately find it hard to keep the pace
And I'm looking for a place to go
But only for a little while
And then the feeling
I'll never know which way to flow
Set a course that I don't know
I'll never know which way to flow
Set a course that I don't know
Friday, June 13, 2008
Thursday, June 12, 2008
double yew tee eff?!
so last night during the artwalk i started to feel uncomfortable - my upper midsection felt distended and painful, my lower back started to ache. i thought i like i needed to stretch or something, but no position seemed to help. i made it home and thought sitting in the comfy chair would help, but the pain continued and intensified, so i did something i usually don't do - i decided to go down to the emergency room. i called kenny and he was gracious enough to drive me down to christ hospital. i went through the regular rigamarole and got inside, the whole time trying not to think about the pain, which didn't go very well. eventually they checked me out, took x-rays, took a urine sample and they came back with...nothing. but they shot me up with a narcotic (which i have to say was glorious), gave me a prescription for percoset, told me to stick to a bland diet and sent me on my way, telling me to call my doctor this morning to set up an ultrasound to check for some kind of stones. too drugged up to ask questions, i left, picked up my prescription, went home, fell into bed and slept for the first time in weeks.
so this morning i wake up, with no pain at all, and call my doctor to set up the ultrasound. the only problem? he's out of town. won't return until monday. and the office gave the impression they could do little about it. if it gets worse, i have the number for a doctor on call, but she has today off. now not only do i not know what was causing the pain last night, but i won't be able to find out anything new until monday. at least if the pain returns i have something to take - of course, if i take them, i'll be stuck at my house, unable to do anything or go anywhere.
can you feel the frustration?
i guess i just ride this out, go on with my day, see what happens. could it be something as simple as something i ate? but (how to put this delicately) everything i've eaten is still in my system. could the narcotic they gave me still be keeping me without pain? is it going to come back with a vengeance? do i need to cancel plans? grrrrrrrr.
ok, enough whining. off to be semi-productive until i go to get my car radio (hopefully) fixed.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Barnabas - Subterfuge
via FoxyTunes
so this morning i wake up, with no pain at all, and call my doctor to set up the ultrasound. the only problem? he's out of town. won't return until monday. and the office gave the impression they could do little about it. if it gets worse, i have the number for a doctor on call, but she has today off. now not only do i not know what was causing the pain last night, but i won't be able to find out anything new until monday. at least if the pain returns i have something to take - of course, if i take them, i'll be stuck at my house, unable to do anything or go anywhere.
can you feel the frustration?
i guess i just ride this out, go on with my day, see what happens. could it be something as simple as something i ate? but (how to put this delicately) everything i've eaten is still in my system. could the narcotic they gave me still be keeping me without pain? is it going to come back with a vengeance? do i need to cancel plans? grrrrrrrr.
ok, enough whining. off to be semi-productive until i go to get my car radio (hopefully) fixed.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Barnabas - Subterfuge
via FoxyTunes
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
waiting to get my door fixed
people who know far more than i do about garage doors are supposed to be here sometime in the next couple of hours to repair my broken door. keeping my fingers crossed that it's an easy fix for all involved. be good to actually use the auto door opener as intended, even though i'm trying to not use my car as much as possible.
i've tried several times to sit down and write about my experience teaching sunday morning, but the words aren't coming. all i know is the thoughts God gave me certainly resonated with many people there and the entire service felt knit together by God. quite a humbling experience all around. but i hope to write more later, once i find my words.
part of the problem - or at least one of the factors i can point to as being a problem - is my continued lack of sleep. yes, the machine that's supposed to be my ally in my battle with insomnia has switched sides and is now conspiring to keep me awake. this is frustrating since the reason i got the machine in the first place was because i was waking up feeling less than rested. now i still wake up like that, only it's from actual lack of sleep instead of lack of deep sleep. i'm going to give it one more night, which will make it a full week, and if it doesn't seem to be getting better, i'm going to call the doctor and see if i'm doing something wrong or if i'm one of those people who does not benefit from use of the machine. how i long for a good night's sleep...
still trying to find a rhythm to my break. yesterday i did four hours of yard work, in the heat, which meant i was a sweaty mess by the time lunchtime came and did not feeling much like eating. but i got the weeds pulled up for the most part and the lawn mowed, so there's some sense of accomplishment. but the rest of the day was spent recovering for the most part. today has been good as i've gotten some more stuff taken care of, but still i'd like to set aside some time for writing and for exercising and not spend so much time confined to the comfy chair. we'll see what happens.
of course, i would be more active without my latest adventure in time suckage. not that i'm complaining...
thinking i might need to go take a nap, which given my sleep problems is probably not a good idea. but since i'm not sleeping, i'm tired. ah, vicious cirlce, how i hate thee.
odd...i thought i had more to share. it will probably come to me later.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: The Seedy Seeds - Grace
via FoxyTunes
i've tried several times to sit down and write about my experience teaching sunday morning, but the words aren't coming. all i know is the thoughts God gave me certainly resonated with many people there and the entire service felt knit together by God. quite a humbling experience all around. but i hope to write more later, once i find my words.
part of the problem - or at least one of the factors i can point to as being a problem - is my continued lack of sleep. yes, the machine that's supposed to be my ally in my battle with insomnia has switched sides and is now conspiring to keep me awake. this is frustrating since the reason i got the machine in the first place was because i was waking up feeling less than rested. now i still wake up like that, only it's from actual lack of sleep instead of lack of deep sleep. i'm going to give it one more night, which will make it a full week, and if it doesn't seem to be getting better, i'm going to call the doctor and see if i'm doing something wrong or if i'm one of those people who does not benefit from use of the machine. how i long for a good night's sleep...
still trying to find a rhythm to my break. yesterday i did four hours of yard work, in the heat, which meant i was a sweaty mess by the time lunchtime came and did not feeling much like eating. but i got the weeds pulled up for the most part and the lawn mowed, so there's some sense of accomplishment. but the rest of the day was spent recovering for the most part. today has been good as i've gotten some more stuff taken care of, but still i'd like to set aside some time for writing and for exercising and not spend so much time confined to the comfy chair. we'll see what happens.
of course, i would be more active without my latest adventure in time suckage. not that i'm complaining...
thinking i might need to go take a nap, which given my sleep problems is probably not a good idea. but since i'm not sleeping, i'm tired. ah, vicious cirlce, how i hate thee.
odd...i thought i had more to share. it will probably come to me later.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: The Seedy Seeds - Grace
via FoxyTunes
Friday, June 06, 2008
so much for having time to write
second official day of break and this is the first time i've had to sit down and write. ok, not quite true. i've had time, but not the desire. energy. whatever.
school's out. this makes me happy. ecstatic. whatever.
i sense a trend. a theme. whatever.
been an uneventful couple of days, and both included trips to mason, which makes it feel like break hasn't officially started yet. actually, i think it will be monday before i start to really feel it. right now it seems like a long weekend. i did discover something today: i am definitely going to have to find some kind of rhythm to my days. i had great plans today but they were sapped by the unseasonably hot weather. really? 95 in june? isn't that a bit ridiculous? i think so. so much for the yard work i hoped to get done. can't say i miss being a sweaty mess, though. praise God for air conditioning.
from the decisions that may come back to haunt me file: as i went to check out on wednesday, i was stopped by one of the secretaries who asked for my peer observation forms. one problem: i didn't have any. see, as part of our staff development, we were supposed to take one of our plan bells and go observe another teacher teaching in the belief we become better teachers by seeing what others do. and i agree with the sentiment. only, most plan bells i was busy doing other things like, well, planning and grading. and with a student teacher, it slipped my mind. and even though i agree with the sentiment, i didn't care enough to actually do it. fatal flaw, thy name is apathy. now, i could have simply done what some other teachers i've talked to did - simply find a fellow colleague to sign the form for you and turn it in. but that would be lying. so rather than do that, i simply said i didn't do it, which i'm sure will bring about negative consequences of some sort. guess i should feel good about being honest, but actually i don't feel much of anything at the moment.
sunday i'm teaching during our weekly gathering at st. e's. i have a good sense of what direction i want to go, but need to do a little more praying/thinking/studying. not nervous...yet. but i can see it coming. always tough being an instrument of God.
am getting excited about my trip to denver already. alexa called and said there may be the possibility of a camping excursion while i'm there - in wyoming. this was totally rock. i hope it works out, though really, being that close to the mountains will be good for my soul as will seeing good friends.
finally acquired my bi-pap machine. been two nights of misery, but last night was better than the first, so i have great hope it will continue to be better. of course, since the machine is keeping me up, i'm not seeing the benefits of the machine yet. looking forward to the day i sleep through the night with the machine. here's hoping the benefits outweigh the hassle.
went and saw son of rambow tonight. cute. that's the word that comes to mind. good, uplifting way to spend a friday night. much better than most of what's in the theaters now. not sure what the next movie on my list is. did pick up a couple dvds at blockbuster yesterday - bourne identity, waitress and before the devil knows your dead. haven't seen the latter, but heard great things about it. and i like the cast. and it only cost me 3.33, so i took a chance. i'll let you know.
time to fight the machine. i hope it's gentle tonight. will need the energy tomorrow - helping tear down the beauty set and then have chris's party. crazy.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Elton John - Tiny Dancer
via FoxyTunes
school's out. this makes me happy. ecstatic. whatever.
i sense a trend. a theme. whatever.
been an uneventful couple of days, and both included trips to mason, which makes it feel like break hasn't officially started yet. actually, i think it will be monday before i start to really feel it. right now it seems like a long weekend. i did discover something today: i am definitely going to have to find some kind of rhythm to my days. i had great plans today but they were sapped by the unseasonably hot weather. really? 95 in june? isn't that a bit ridiculous? i think so. so much for the yard work i hoped to get done. can't say i miss being a sweaty mess, though. praise God for air conditioning.
from the decisions that may come back to haunt me file: as i went to check out on wednesday, i was stopped by one of the secretaries who asked for my peer observation forms. one problem: i didn't have any. see, as part of our staff development, we were supposed to take one of our plan bells and go observe another teacher teaching in the belief we become better teachers by seeing what others do. and i agree with the sentiment. only, most plan bells i was busy doing other things like, well, planning and grading. and with a student teacher, it slipped my mind. and even though i agree with the sentiment, i didn't care enough to actually do it. fatal flaw, thy name is apathy. now, i could have simply done what some other teachers i've talked to did - simply find a fellow colleague to sign the form for you and turn it in. but that would be lying. so rather than do that, i simply said i didn't do it, which i'm sure will bring about negative consequences of some sort. guess i should feel good about being honest, but actually i don't feel much of anything at the moment.
sunday i'm teaching during our weekly gathering at st. e's. i have a good sense of what direction i want to go, but need to do a little more praying/thinking/studying. not nervous...yet. but i can see it coming. always tough being an instrument of God.
am getting excited about my trip to denver already. alexa called and said there may be the possibility of a camping excursion while i'm there - in wyoming. this was totally rock. i hope it works out, though really, being that close to the mountains will be good for my soul as will seeing good friends.
finally acquired my bi-pap machine. been two nights of misery, but last night was better than the first, so i have great hope it will continue to be better. of course, since the machine is keeping me up, i'm not seeing the benefits of the machine yet. looking forward to the day i sleep through the night with the machine. here's hoping the benefits outweigh the hassle.
went and saw son of rambow tonight. cute. that's the word that comes to mind. good, uplifting way to spend a friday night. much better than most of what's in the theaters now. not sure what the next movie on my list is. did pick up a couple dvds at blockbuster yesterday - bourne identity, waitress and before the devil knows your dead. haven't seen the latter, but heard great things about it. and i like the cast. and it only cost me 3.33, so i took a chance. i'll let you know.
time to fight the machine. i hope it's gentle tonight. will need the energy tomorrow - helping tear down the beauty set and then have chris's party. crazy.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Elton John - Tiny Dancer
via FoxyTunes
Monday, June 02, 2008
five down (almost), twenty-five (at least) to go
one more day with students. two more days of official school business. and now i have to be up there on thursday for some training for my auditorium tech job, but it includes lunch and is definitely worth it. but tomorrow is the last day i have to get up at 5AM for a while. you have no idea how ecstatic this makes me. no, really, no idea.
graduation was an excellent end to the year once again. since the ceremony is held at the cintas center, practically in my backyard, i walked again. and was a sweaty mess by the time i got there. at least this time i brought a towel with me to help with the cool down process. next year i'll have to bring a change of shirts. stupid overactive cooling system.
nearly six hundred graduates this year. i am always amazed at how many of the students i had little to no interaction with. so different from my student teaching experience where every senior was in one of my classes. i wish sometimes i could be a part of a smaller community where we got to know every student. but the number i did know was significant enough to make it a meaningful celebration. so great to see students taking that final step toward...(i almost said adulthood but anymore it's just the next stage of an extended adolescence. now is not the time to talk about that). and so great to see the joy on their faces as they walked out of the ceremony and saw the teachers lining the hallways, high-fives and handshakes and hugs punctuating congratulations and expressions of relief from both students and teachers. it was not the time to wonder what lie ahead, but the time to celebrate what they had accomplished. the future will wait one more day.
i did have one complaint: it seems to me if you spend three to five years of your life getting your masters degree, you should be allowed to wear your hood. if you can't wear it at graduation, when else are you going to get to wear it? i'm just sayin'.
stayed late after school to get as much grading as i could done before the final batch of exams. all the journals and late work are tallied up now. while first and second bell take theirs, i'll be grading the essay portion of fourth and fifth bell. then hopefully during third bell exam (my plan) i'll be able to get through a significant portion of first and second bell's exams. that will leave only their final reading reflection and any late work turned in tomorrow. the goal is to be completely done with grading by the time i step out the door in the afternoon so wednesday i just have to pack up my stuff and get the heck out of the dodge. here's hoping for a smooth transition to summer life.
for any of my faithful readers in the cincy area, i will be teaching this coming sunday morning in our weekly celebration at st. e's. 10:00AM. the question? what is God calling you away from. at least that's where i think God is leading. we'll see.
brian called today and told me he's bought his plane tickets for the tom waits show at the end of june. i need to figure out where we're going to stay - he flies into columbus on friday night and leaves sunday afternoon, so no use driving all the way back to cincy. i'll check with some of the friends we have up there - surely someone will put two wayfaring souls up for a couple of nights. i hope. looking forward to seeing brian again, especially since it will include seeing tom waits, too. we're trying to organize some kind of social gathering before the show. guess i should look into that as well. at least there's time for that.
last night i put together an over the rhine compilation for my friend kurt's wife. i probably should have been grading, but this was much more fun. i took two song from each of their major releases and one live track from besides. i left off the christmas songs. was tough whittling it down. here's the list, organized chronologically by cd (in case someone wants to compare it to what they'd put on such a cd).
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Johnny Cash & Nick Cave - Cindy (With Nick Cave)
via FoxyTunes
graduation was an excellent end to the year once again. since the ceremony is held at the cintas center, practically in my backyard, i walked again. and was a sweaty mess by the time i got there. at least this time i brought a towel with me to help with the cool down process. next year i'll have to bring a change of shirts. stupid overactive cooling system.
nearly six hundred graduates this year. i am always amazed at how many of the students i had little to no interaction with. so different from my student teaching experience where every senior was in one of my classes. i wish sometimes i could be a part of a smaller community where we got to know every student. but the number i did know was significant enough to make it a meaningful celebration. so great to see students taking that final step toward...(i almost said adulthood but anymore it's just the next stage of an extended adolescence. now is not the time to talk about that). and so great to see the joy on their faces as they walked out of the ceremony and saw the teachers lining the hallways, high-fives and handshakes and hugs punctuating congratulations and expressions of relief from both students and teachers. it was not the time to wonder what lie ahead, but the time to celebrate what they had accomplished. the future will wait one more day.
i did have one complaint: it seems to me if you spend three to five years of your life getting your masters degree, you should be allowed to wear your hood. if you can't wear it at graduation, when else are you going to get to wear it? i'm just sayin'.
stayed late after school to get as much grading as i could done before the final batch of exams. all the journals and late work are tallied up now. while first and second bell take theirs, i'll be grading the essay portion of fourth and fifth bell. then hopefully during third bell exam (my plan) i'll be able to get through a significant portion of first and second bell's exams. that will leave only their final reading reflection and any late work turned in tomorrow. the goal is to be completely done with grading by the time i step out the door in the afternoon so wednesday i just have to pack up my stuff and get the heck out of the dodge. here's hoping for a smooth transition to summer life.
for any of my faithful readers in the cincy area, i will be teaching this coming sunday morning in our weekly celebration at st. e's. 10:00AM. the question? what is God calling you away from. at least that's where i think God is leading. we'll see.
brian called today and told me he's bought his plane tickets for the tom waits show at the end of june. i need to figure out where we're going to stay - he flies into columbus on friday night and leaves sunday afternoon, so no use driving all the way back to cincy. i'll check with some of the friends we have up there - surely someone will put two wayfaring souls up for a couple of nights. i hope. looking forward to seeing brian again, especially since it will include seeing tom waits, too. we're trying to organize some kind of social gathering before the show. guess i should look into that as well. at least there's time for that.
last night i put together an over the rhine compilation for my friend kurt's wife. i probably should have been grading, but this was much more fun. i took two song from each of their major releases and one live track from besides. i left off the christmas songs. was tough whittling it down. here's the list, organized chronologically by cd (in case someone wants to compare it to what they'd put on such a cd).
If I'm Drowning
Paul And Virginia
Circle Of Quiet
Rhapsodie
Sleep Baby Jane
Bothered
My Love Is A Fever (Live)
Latter Days
The World Can Wait
Moth
B.P.D.
Nobody Number One
Drunkard's Prayer
Who Will Guard The Door
Trouble
Don't Wait For Tom
not a bad retrospective, if i do say so myself. and i do.
ok, time for bed. here's hoping i get everything done. come glorious end, so i might begin again.Æ
----------------
Now playing: Johnny Cash & Nick Cave - Cindy (With Nick Cave)
via FoxyTunes
Saturday, May 31, 2008
you! me! dancing!
the title of this post is brought to you by los campesinos! they love their exclamation points.
working the bonnie williams dance extravaganza. been here since noon. it's still going on, though i hope it ends in the next hour or so. nothing like a ten/eleven hour day. but it gave me time to get through some journal, though only half. unlike many groups, this one needed much more personal attention. had to fix the traveler, put in the gobo, and my personal favorite, wire up their chandeliers. have to say, was much easier this year. still, more time than i would like to spend. i know, i shouldn't complain, it's such a cushy job.
the end is in sight. two exam days. one teacher work day. and then summer in all of its glory is upon me. looking forward to not waking up before the sun rises, though i'll still be up early for prayers. at least this summer i'll get to go - no summer courses at miami this time. oh how sweet. though i might see if i can carve an hour or two out of each day to do some writing. and i'm going to try and not drive if i don't have to - will walk or ride everywhere, which will mean a little more planning on my part. but with gas at or above $4 a gallon, i think it will be worth it. started a little this week - met colin at quatman's and walked there. about 4 miles round trip. not too bad. and if i actually get around to buying groceries, i won't get sick of eating at the restaurants in norwood.
and believe it or not i have plans! plans for the summer! alexa emailed me this week and invited me to come out to colorado, which made two invites in less than a week - a sure sign i should go. so i jumped online, did a quick search for cheap plane tickets, found some that were within my budget and voilà, i'm off to colorado for 13 days. be good to be back in the mountains again, and to see alexa and ryan and shannon and paul. now i just have to figure out what i'm going to do while i'm there. don't want to mooch off my friends too much while i'm there. should have time to make plans before july. nice to know i won't spend the entire summer locked in my house....
sounds like the dance extravaganza is ending. probably need to head down and start dismantling everything i set up. i don't think it will take long. at least i hope not. will have to blog a bit more tomorrow, either before or after graduation, which is tomorrow. could be an emotional day. i'll have to let you know.
Æ
now playing: U2 - another time, another place
working the bonnie williams dance extravaganza. been here since noon. it's still going on, though i hope it ends in the next hour or so. nothing like a ten/eleven hour day. but it gave me time to get through some journal, though only half. unlike many groups, this one needed much more personal attention. had to fix the traveler, put in the gobo, and my personal favorite, wire up their chandeliers. have to say, was much easier this year. still, more time than i would like to spend. i know, i shouldn't complain, it's such a cushy job.
the end is in sight. two exam days. one teacher work day. and then summer in all of its glory is upon me. looking forward to not waking up before the sun rises, though i'll still be up early for prayers. at least this summer i'll get to go - no summer courses at miami this time. oh how sweet. though i might see if i can carve an hour or two out of each day to do some writing. and i'm going to try and not drive if i don't have to - will walk or ride everywhere, which will mean a little more planning on my part. but with gas at or above $4 a gallon, i think it will be worth it. started a little this week - met colin at quatman's and walked there. about 4 miles round trip. not too bad. and if i actually get around to buying groceries, i won't get sick of eating at the restaurants in norwood.
and believe it or not i have plans! plans for the summer! alexa emailed me this week and invited me to come out to colorado, which made two invites in less than a week - a sure sign i should go. so i jumped online, did a quick search for cheap plane tickets, found some that were within my budget and voilà, i'm off to colorado for 13 days. be good to be back in the mountains again, and to see alexa and ryan and shannon and paul. now i just have to figure out what i'm going to do while i'm there. don't want to mooch off my friends too much while i'm there. should have time to make plans before july. nice to know i won't spend the entire summer locked in my house....
sounds like the dance extravaganza is ending. probably need to head down and start dismantling everything i set up. i don't think it will take long. at least i hope not. will have to blog a bit more tomorrow, either before or after graduation, which is tomorrow. could be an emotional day. i'll have to let you know.
Æ
now playing: U2 - another time, another place
Monday, May 26, 2008
perpetratin' a little stimulation
glorious "geekend" in wild and wonderful weirvegas. definitely worth the trip. friday was spent waiting for steve to finally arrive, eventually resulting in playing a kim possible video game and for some unexplicable reason, us toasting jeremy (jerry!) with harvey wallbangers (which turned out to be completely appropriate, though we didn't know it at the time. from wikipedia: "The Annual Howie Wallbanger is party held at Hal's Bar and Grill in Venice, California on the Friday before Memorial Day that celebrates the Harvey Wallbanger cocktail." spoooooky). then saturday, after a morning of trading mp3s, we traveled up to pittsburgh, where i engaged in some economic stimulation. my tools of choice:
bubba ho tep dvd
reefer madness: the musical dvd
the muppet show season 2 dvd
the muppet show season 3 dvd
following the stimulation, we headed to primanti brothers to watch the pens/wings game. good time, even though the pens lost. kind of torn since i like both teams - actually would be happy to see either one win (though right now it looks like it will be detroit in a walk...er...skate).
then sunday, i headed over to bloomingdale ohio for paul and shannon's post-nuptial hootenanny. was running late and then got pulled over on the way there (for not having a properly displayed front liscense plate) and then missed the turn not once, not twice, but three times. but i eventually made it. was nervous it would be awkward since i didn't really know anyone but shannon and paul (though i'd met her sisters before), but it was a good time. glad i got to go. at one point, while shannon and paul were visiting everyone, i stepped outside to enjoy the spectacular day. something about the rolling hills of ohio that make me wistful - can my family memory go that deep? anyway, i got to thinking about how i've been feeling hope slip away lately, how the possibility of me celebrating my own post-nuptial hootenanny grows fainter and fainter. standing there, warmed by the late-may sun, i realized it wasn't hope that was slipping away; rather, it was the need to get married for my life to be complete. am i becoming (gasp!) content? perhaps. and i'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing. good because obviously i won't be quite so whiny anymore (at least about this). bad because i no longer feel the impetus to find someone, to be searching. i don't know. will have to give it more thought, which i'll have plenty of time to do come next week...
today was fairly lazy. had grand plans to go on a long bike ride. turned into a fairly short jaunt up to jalepenos (where i ran into my friend kristin and her husband) and half price books (where i continued my stimulation by purchasing buechner's telling the truth and klosterman's killing yourself to live). with gas prices pushing $4.00, i'd like to get in the habit of not driving if i don't have to, trying to stay local as much as possible. did that for the most part today, other than an ironic trip to fill my tank ($45.00!). other than that, my day was spent (wasted?) doing very little. which was nice. of course, it makes it quite difficult to get excited about going to class for the rest of the week. but the end is here. and there was much rejoicing.
time for bed.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Big Country - Fields of Fire (400 Miles)
via FoxyTunes
bubba ho tep dvd
reefer madness: the musical dvd
the muppet show season 2 dvd
the muppet show season 3 dvd
following the stimulation, we headed to primanti brothers to watch the pens/wings game. good time, even though the pens lost. kind of torn since i like both teams - actually would be happy to see either one win (though right now it looks like it will be detroit in a walk...er...skate).
then sunday, i headed over to bloomingdale ohio for paul and shannon's post-nuptial hootenanny. was running late and then got pulled over on the way there (for not having a properly displayed front liscense plate) and then missed the turn not once, not twice, but three times. but i eventually made it. was nervous it would be awkward since i didn't really know anyone but shannon and paul (though i'd met her sisters before), but it was a good time. glad i got to go. at one point, while shannon and paul were visiting everyone, i stepped outside to enjoy the spectacular day. something about the rolling hills of ohio that make me wistful - can my family memory go that deep? anyway, i got to thinking about how i've been feeling hope slip away lately, how the possibility of me celebrating my own post-nuptial hootenanny grows fainter and fainter. standing there, warmed by the late-may sun, i realized it wasn't hope that was slipping away; rather, it was the need to get married for my life to be complete. am i becoming (gasp!) content? perhaps. and i'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing. good because obviously i won't be quite so whiny anymore (at least about this). bad because i no longer feel the impetus to find someone, to be searching. i don't know. will have to give it more thought, which i'll have plenty of time to do come next week...
today was fairly lazy. had grand plans to go on a long bike ride. turned into a fairly short jaunt up to jalepenos (where i ran into my friend kristin and her husband) and half price books (where i continued my stimulation by purchasing buechner's telling the truth and klosterman's killing yourself to live). with gas prices pushing $4.00, i'd like to get in the habit of not driving if i don't have to, trying to stay local as much as possible. did that for the most part today, other than an ironic trip to fill my tank ($45.00!). other than that, my day was spent (wasted?) doing very little. which was nice. of course, it makes it quite difficult to get excited about going to class for the rest of the week. but the end is here. and there was much rejoicing.
time for bed.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Big Country - Fields of Fire (400 Miles)
via FoxyTunes
Thursday, May 22, 2008
the loss of the great adventure
went after school today with some of the film club kids to see indiana jones and the kingdom of the crystal skull. i was anxious when i read the title; i became concerned when i saw the early pics of the crystal skull; i cringed when i saw shia lebouf would be in the movie and threw up in my mouth a little when i heard he would be indy's son; but these were all rumours and i went into the regal theater in mason with the mindset of an eleven-year-old, the age i had seen the original film, seeking nothing more than two hours of adventure.
i should have known better.
the action lacked visceral impact, the gross-outs seemed half-hearted, the humor was forced and every character was simply a caricature. i had hoped to thrill to seeing indy on the big screen again. instead, it just made me sad. this picture, like its star, is a shell of his old self. the magic and wonder from the early films danced around the edges, but never came to fruition on the screen. and oh my the climax. please. lucas and spielberg's attempts to shoehorn '50s sci-fi into indy's universe failed spectacularly. i kept waiting for crow and servo to pop up in the corner.
more a disappointment than a bad movie, i guess, but still. pretty sure i won't be adding this one to my collection. i'll stick with the originals.
in other news....
five teaching days left. two exam days. one teacher work day. staying focused is becoming more and more difficult for everyone, myself included. not sure i like ending with mockingbird if only because i feel a bit rushed and there's so much good stuff in there i'm afraid they'll miss. but i guess that's why we reread books at different ages. or at least why we should. most of them seem to like it so far. now if i can just sustain the interest after the trial. we'll see.
senior picnic is tomorrow and they called today to ask if i could come out during my plan bell. will be good to see them off. this is a special class because i had some of them both sophomore and senior years. i'll have a slight chance to do that next year, though i'm only teaching two bells worth all year, compared to the six i did this year. makes me sad - i had hoped to do more. but with all the changes in organization, we weren't asked our preferences this year. not sure why my load went down, then, but nothing i can do at this point other than be patient and hope the opportunity comes later.
bought a couple cds this week - old 97's blame it on gravity and king's x xv. enjoying both of them immensely. it's odd - i've not actually listened to my old 97's cd - first time it was out of the wrapper i burned it to my hard drive/ipod and i have only listened to the mp3s. makes me question why i bother buying the hard copy anymore. maybe i'm reaching the point like i did with cassettes where i stop buying cds and only pick up digital copies. am thinking of hitting amazon and downloading a couple things i've been wanting. i'm a little afraid that once i start, i'll never go back. but it has to be better for the environment, right? or something like that.
heading up to northeast ohio/weirton this weekend. a movie party at steve's turned into a trip to weirton and a couple of nights in a hotel. don't ask. will then head over to bloomingdale ohio for shannon and paul's post-nuptial reception. didn't realize i needed to rsvp until last night (ooops) but contacted shannon's mom and it all worked out. makes me happy. of course, after all that driving, i'll probably feel a bit fuelish (sorry, i tried to stop myself but couldn't). and to think not long ago i was thinking $3.00 a gallon was too high. silly me.
started researching hdtvs - someone bought my miami voucher so i have a little extra cash - but will probably be responsible and pay down my one remaining credit card. i know i'll get a new tv sometime, but want to feel a little more settled before doing that. if i could get out of all my debt except for my eternal student loans and my house, i think i'd be much happier. we'll see what i can do. may check into finding a company to help me as i'm a bit wary of attempting the math myself. and attempting to get a lower rate.
ok, enough time here. probably won't post until after the weekend, though i will be taking my laptop with me, so if the hotel has free wifi, i might jump on. that's all for tonight.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Old 97's - The Fool
via FoxyTunes
i should have known better.
the action lacked visceral impact, the gross-outs seemed half-hearted, the humor was forced and every character was simply a caricature. i had hoped to thrill to seeing indy on the big screen again. instead, it just made me sad. this picture, like its star, is a shell of his old self. the magic and wonder from the early films danced around the edges, but never came to fruition on the screen. and oh my the climax. please. lucas and spielberg's attempts to shoehorn '50s sci-fi into indy's universe failed spectacularly. i kept waiting for crow and servo to pop up in the corner.
more a disappointment than a bad movie, i guess, but still. pretty sure i won't be adding this one to my collection. i'll stick with the originals.
in other news....
five teaching days left. two exam days. one teacher work day. staying focused is becoming more and more difficult for everyone, myself included. not sure i like ending with mockingbird if only because i feel a bit rushed and there's so much good stuff in there i'm afraid they'll miss. but i guess that's why we reread books at different ages. or at least why we should. most of them seem to like it so far. now if i can just sustain the interest after the trial. we'll see.
senior picnic is tomorrow and they called today to ask if i could come out during my plan bell. will be good to see them off. this is a special class because i had some of them both sophomore and senior years. i'll have a slight chance to do that next year, though i'm only teaching two bells worth all year, compared to the six i did this year. makes me sad - i had hoped to do more. but with all the changes in organization, we weren't asked our preferences this year. not sure why my load went down, then, but nothing i can do at this point other than be patient and hope the opportunity comes later.
bought a couple cds this week - old 97's blame it on gravity and king's x xv. enjoying both of them immensely. it's odd - i've not actually listened to my old 97's cd - first time it was out of the wrapper i burned it to my hard drive/ipod and i have only listened to the mp3s. makes me question why i bother buying the hard copy anymore. maybe i'm reaching the point like i did with cassettes where i stop buying cds and only pick up digital copies. am thinking of hitting amazon and downloading a couple things i've been wanting. i'm a little afraid that once i start, i'll never go back. but it has to be better for the environment, right? or something like that.
heading up to northeast ohio/weirton this weekend. a movie party at steve's turned into a trip to weirton and a couple of nights in a hotel. don't ask. will then head over to bloomingdale ohio for shannon and paul's post-nuptial reception. didn't realize i needed to rsvp until last night (ooops) but contacted shannon's mom and it all worked out. makes me happy. of course, after all that driving, i'll probably feel a bit fuelish (sorry, i tried to stop myself but couldn't). and to think not long ago i was thinking $3.00 a gallon was too high. silly me.
started researching hdtvs - someone bought my miami voucher so i have a little extra cash - but will probably be responsible and pay down my one remaining credit card. i know i'll get a new tv sometime, but want to feel a little more settled before doing that. if i could get out of all my debt except for my eternal student loans and my house, i think i'd be much happier. we'll see what i can do. may check into finding a company to help me as i'm a bit wary of attempting the math myself. and attempting to get a lower rate.
ok, enough time here. probably won't post until after the weekend, though i will be taking my laptop with me, so if the hotel has free wifi, i might jump on. that's all for tonight.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Old 97's - The Fool
via FoxyTunes
Sunday, May 18, 2008
snippets
exhausted. sick. bloated. emotionally drained. fuzzy from the dayquill.
finished my grading. wishing i could call in sick tomorrow. nose running. throat scratchy.
mason community band blowing in the background. ryan adams in my ears.
nine teaching days remain. ten total.
feeling numb about the end of beauty. will probably hit tomorrow.
seeing tom in june. with brian. floor seats, row r. cannot waits. err..wait.
great story to share. not now. notebook in my strike bag. grrr.
worried about summer. no plans. no ideas. what to do...
missing friends. disconnected. isolated. own fault.
reread microserfs. still great. i miss the old doug. sometimes.
lungs burning. hurts to stand and walk. usual post-show cold.
winebag = greatest party game ever.
intermission. need to be ready for lights. more this week.
Æ
tunes: the dirtbombs - your love belongs under a rock
finished my grading. wishing i could call in sick tomorrow. nose running. throat scratchy.
mason community band blowing in the background. ryan adams in my ears.
nine teaching days remain. ten total.
feeling numb about the end of beauty. will probably hit tomorrow.
seeing tom in june. with brian. floor seats, row r. cannot waits. err..wait.
great story to share. not now. notebook in my strike bag. grrr.
worried about summer. no plans. no ideas. what to do...
missing friends. disconnected. isolated. own fault.
reread microserfs. still great. i miss the old doug. sometimes.
lungs burning. hurts to stand and walk. usual post-show cold.
winebag = greatest party game ever.
intermission. need to be ready for lights. more this week.
Æ
tunes: the dirtbombs - your love belongs under a rock
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
the show, the test and the overwhelming desire to give into consumerism
the nether realm of the devil and the demons in which the damned suffer everlasting punishment week lived up to its name - getting used to costumes, figuring out tons of tech stuff, having to stop rehearsal early to get out of the theater in time, last minute changes to choreography. exhausting. but thursday came, our first performance with an audience (the ushers from the aronoff) and it went well. then friday came and the excitement carried us through some minor problems and one major one - the dry ice machine used during the transformation clogged, which took away from some of the effect. but the audience enjoyed themselves, which is most important. personally i was off my game - missed steps here, dropped notes there - but nothing major. not like saturday night, when my egg beater costume fell apart during the end of "be our guest." i had to stand there and hold the two beaters during the kickline. couldn't help but smile and laugh. they duct taped it all back together for act ii and it held up well.
i'm always amazed at what causes my heart to sink and what i let wash over me. friday night the errors and problems were minor, but i was far more frustrated with them than i was saturday when the error was much more noticeable. maybe it's because i had control over the first night's errors and they were my fault, whereas the costume malfunction had nothing to do with me (other than my overzealous dancing i suppose). i have always been harder on myself than on others. wish i offered grace as easily to myself as i do to others.
first weekend also meant two cast parties. i was out of it at the first one - wasn't feeling terribly social and ended up lingering around the food table. the long island ice tea i had probably didn't help my mood any. i left early, partially because i had to be up at 6AM for a last minute auditorium gig (jack had to go to a funeral) and partially because i was too tired to socialize. saturday was much better - was at ron's (lefou) house in hyde park and was fantastic. wendy made another amazing cake and they even had a raffle - i won a miniature painting from beauty and the beast of the final frame of the film. very cool. ron and his partner donny have an amazing house - made me feel again like i don't really deserve to be a homeowner. maybe i can work on that this summer.
tonight we start our final run of five shows. i took the day off to prepare and because i had my follow up sleep test to get the CPAP machine calibrated. i had great expectations - have heard so much positive about the results i was looking forward to a great night's sleep for the first time in years. unfortunately, reality did not meet expectations. started off when the technician told me results usually were dependent on the patient's attitude and the severity of the apnea - the more severe, the more efficacious the treatment was. so i suppose i shouldn't be surprised that i spent a restless night since i only have mild apnea. and i guess my attitude wasn't positive enough. couldn't fall asleep, couldn't stay asleep and everytime i woke i couldn't get used to the rhythms of the machine. too aware of my breathing i suppose. woke up tired and sleepy and frustrated. we'll see how it works for a month. hopefully i'll get used to it and it will benefit me. but i'm feeling a bit wary after last night's struggles. the technician also mentioned some other issue that wasn't discussed in my first test - not restless leg but something similar. don't know. hopefully the doctor will see last night's results and have a better understanding. we'll see.
my bush bribe arrived in my bank account last week and i've been wondering what i should do with it. add to that my receipt of a miami certificate and my recent tax returns and my bank account finally looks like a normal person's instead of some struggling post-college, pre-career slacker. used part of it to pay off my debt to best buy (bastards! - sorry, but they royally pissed me off) and will probably do the same for lowe's which will leave me with only one high-interest, maxed-out credit card. would like to sit down with a financial planner, but don't know where to begin looking. and i'm afraid they'll tell me i have to give up things that i like. better to live in ignorance than guilt, right? we'll see. been fighting the urge to splurge on items i don't really *need* but would like to own. luckily, my genetic frugality, passed to me from my garage-sale-loving mom (love you!), keeps me from giving in too easily most of the time.
ok, time to relax before the show tonight. call is at 5:30 for a 7:30 show, which means i should be done early tonight which is good since tomorrow is going to be frantic to say the least. film club tomorrow afternoon and we won't be done until after 4:30 and then i have to drive home in rush hour traffic and grab a quick shower before heading down to the theater, most likely without time to grab something to eat. not looking forward to it. at least we're watching raiders, in anticipation of the new film next week, which should be fun. much better than the abysmal the devil's advocate (sorry nathan, but it was bad). will probably not have time to post again 'til post-show. thanks for being patient. back soon, probably to complain about having nothing to do this summer yet...
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Los Campesinos! - We Are All Accelerated Readers
via FoxyTunes
i'm always amazed at what causes my heart to sink and what i let wash over me. friday night the errors and problems were minor, but i was far more frustrated with them than i was saturday when the error was much more noticeable. maybe it's because i had control over the first night's errors and they were my fault, whereas the costume malfunction had nothing to do with me (other than my overzealous dancing i suppose). i have always been harder on myself than on others. wish i offered grace as easily to myself as i do to others.
first weekend also meant two cast parties. i was out of it at the first one - wasn't feeling terribly social and ended up lingering around the food table. the long island ice tea i had probably didn't help my mood any. i left early, partially because i had to be up at 6AM for a last minute auditorium gig (jack had to go to a funeral) and partially because i was too tired to socialize. saturday was much better - was at ron's (lefou) house in hyde park and was fantastic. wendy made another amazing cake and they even had a raffle - i won a miniature painting from beauty and the beast of the final frame of the film. very cool. ron and his partner donny have an amazing house - made me feel again like i don't really deserve to be a homeowner. maybe i can work on that this summer.
tonight we start our final run of five shows. i took the day off to prepare and because i had my follow up sleep test to get the CPAP machine calibrated. i had great expectations - have heard so much positive about the results i was looking forward to a great night's sleep for the first time in years. unfortunately, reality did not meet expectations. started off when the technician told me results usually were dependent on the patient's attitude and the severity of the apnea - the more severe, the more efficacious the treatment was. so i suppose i shouldn't be surprised that i spent a restless night since i only have mild apnea. and i guess my attitude wasn't positive enough. couldn't fall asleep, couldn't stay asleep and everytime i woke i couldn't get used to the rhythms of the machine. too aware of my breathing i suppose. woke up tired and sleepy and frustrated. we'll see how it works for a month. hopefully i'll get used to it and it will benefit me. but i'm feeling a bit wary after last night's struggles. the technician also mentioned some other issue that wasn't discussed in my first test - not restless leg but something similar. don't know. hopefully the doctor will see last night's results and have a better understanding. we'll see.
my bush bribe arrived in my bank account last week and i've been wondering what i should do with it. add to that my receipt of a miami certificate and my recent tax returns and my bank account finally looks like a normal person's instead of some struggling post-college, pre-career slacker. used part of it to pay off my debt to best buy (bastards! - sorry, but they royally pissed me off) and will probably do the same for lowe's which will leave me with only one high-interest, maxed-out credit card. would like to sit down with a financial planner, but don't know where to begin looking. and i'm afraid they'll tell me i have to give up things that i like. better to live in ignorance than guilt, right? we'll see. been fighting the urge to splurge on items i don't really *need* but would like to own. luckily, my genetic frugality, passed to me from my garage-sale-loving mom (love you!), keeps me from giving in too easily most of the time.
ok, time to relax before the show tonight. call is at 5:30 for a 7:30 show, which means i should be done early tonight which is good since tomorrow is going to be frantic to say the least. film club tomorrow afternoon and we won't be done until after 4:30 and then i have to drive home in rush hour traffic and grab a quick shower before heading down to the theater, most likely without time to grab something to eat. not looking forward to it. at least we're watching raiders, in anticipation of the new film next week, which should be fun. much better than the abysmal the devil's advocate (sorry nathan, but it was bad). will probably not have time to post again 'til post-show. thanks for being patient. back soon, probably to complain about having nothing to do this summer yet...
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Los Campesinos! - We Are All Accelerated Readers
via FoxyTunes
Sunday, May 04, 2008
welcome to the nether realm of the devil and the demons in which the damned suffer everlasting punishment week
i must do this now, while my state of mind is such that i can actually string words together into sentences without ending up blithering on and on. yesterday began the run up to opening night this coming friday - 3 1/2 hours of loading set pieces and flats onto the 53 ft. semi-truck in preparation for load in today, which meant spending the afternoon flying the plethora of set pieces up and out. five hours and i could have stayed longer, but i already know i'll be getting no sleep this week, so i figured i would take it easy tonight and relax. tomorrow my students will take my into the wild test and tuesday we'll finish watching the film (edited courtesy of the filmslayer). and wednesday starts mockingbird. should be loads of fun. now if i can just find time to mow my lawn...
found the free movie pass i thought i'd lost last night, so i used it to watch iron man. excellent comic book flick. robert downey jr. gives a marvelous performance as tony stark. brilliant casting, that. wasn't supersaturated with cgi, which helped in my enjoyment. and the cgi that was there wasn't distracting. helped that the screenplay moved along quickly without the minimum number of typical comic book hero cliché. saw it in a mostly full theater, other than the four seats immediately to the left and right of me. guess no one wanted to sit next to the scary bearded guy in the third row. more room for me, though it did feel a bit awkward at times. didn't help that i was seated directly under a light. i'm sure it looked hilarious. kept reminding me of the "alternate lifestyle" comment from baby mama.
truth is, i've been feeling a bit isolated lately. mostly my own fault - sometimes i'm so comfortable being on my own that i don't think to invite others along to do things. i always assume everyone else has plans already so it will do no good to ask/invite (please, spare me the assume speech). i can't decide if my ability to be alone is a blessing or a curse. sometimes i feel it's a gift of freedom. sometimes i feel it's a prison of selfishness. right now i feel afraid i've fallen into a place of comfortableness with no impetus to change. i fear it's too late now for me to change and the odds of me finding someone to break me out of my cycle of singleness are slim to none. this isn't hopelessness - at least it doesn't feel like it - but more a realization of reality. but i haven't decided if it's an unchangeable reality.
ok, need to go and try to wind down, catch up on some waiting emails before all the nether realm of the devil and the demons in which the damned suffer everlasting punishment breaks loose. see you....sometime.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: My Morning Jacket - Gideon
via FoxyTunes
found the free movie pass i thought i'd lost last night, so i used it to watch iron man. excellent comic book flick. robert downey jr. gives a marvelous performance as tony stark. brilliant casting, that. wasn't supersaturated with cgi, which helped in my enjoyment. and the cgi that was there wasn't distracting. helped that the screenplay moved along quickly without the minimum number of typical comic book hero cliché. saw it in a mostly full theater, other than the four seats immediately to the left and right of me. guess no one wanted to sit next to the scary bearded guy in the third row. more room for me, though it did feel a bit awkward at times. didn't help that i was seated directly under a light. i'm sure it looked hilarious. kept reminding me of the "alternate lifestyle" comment from baby mama.
truth is, i've been feeling a bit isolated lately. mostly my own fault - sometimes i'm so comfortable being on my own that i don't think to invite others along to do things. i always assume everyone else has plans already so it will do no good to ask/invite (please, spare me the assume speech). i can't decide if my ability to be alone is a blessing or a curse. sometimes i feel it's a gift of freedom. sometimes i feel it's a prison of selfishness. right now i feel afraid i've fallen into a place of comfortableness with no impetus to change. i fear it's too late now for me to change and the odds of me finding someone to break me out of my cycle of singleness are slim to none. this isn't hopelessness - at least it doesn't feel like it - but more a realization of reality. but i haven't decided if it's an unchangeable reality.
ok, need to go and try to wind down, catch up on some waiting emails before all the nether realm of the devil and the demons in which the damned suffer everlasting punishment breaks loose. see you....sometime.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: My Morning Jacket - Gideon
via FoxyTunes
Friday, May 02, 2008
comedy is hard
went to my second mainstream hollywood comedy in a week - last week was forgetting sarah marshall, this week was baby mama. for those that know me (and who else would be reading this), these are not my normal choices for films, though fsm, being an apatow production, is more up my alley. watching these two films and thinking about them afterwards led me to agree with the masters - comedy is hard.
i enjoyed myself watching both movies - genuinely funny moments where i laughed out loud and probably rather boisterously. but then afterwards...i questioned just how much i enjoyed them. and i questioned their overall quality. this is probably why i would make a crappy reviewer - i tend to overthink things. isn't it enough to enjoy yourself while watching the movie? isn't it enough just to laugh? but in both cases i caught myself halfway through the movie realizing i didn't buy it. i didn't care at all if peter ended up with either girl because, honestly, i didn't think he deserved either girl (and no, it's not penis envy, thankyouverymuch). and if you couldn't figure out how kate and angela's story was going to end, you just weren't paying attention. i guess that's why i found both movies ultimately unsatisfying - as a series of moments, they were entertaining; as stories, they left me wanting.
confession: if i had to rank them, i'd put baby mama ahead of forgetting sarah marshall. not sure why - maybe it was steve's presence. maybe i find tina much easier on the eyes than jason. who knows. so there. guess they'll take away my elitist card now.
you know what else is hard (please keep your jokes to yourself)? endings. neither film had a satisfying ending to me. writing an ending is tricky business - most of the time they feel like the easy way out or tacked on. rarely do they feel like a part of the story. why do we find it so hard to finish our stories? why are the ideas strong, but the execution weak?
too much thinking for a friday night.
favorite moment from the movie tonight: when kate's mom referred to her being single as "an alternative lifestyle." both painful and funny because it's true.
my life, my normal life anyway, ends this weekend, at least for the next two weeks. load the truck tomorrow, load in at the aronoff on sunday then rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal with audience and show, show, show. i'm exhausted already. i know i'll be in heaven once i'm in it, but i'm dreading it a bit right now because i know it's going to take its toll on me. i'm not so young anymore. sleeping would help, if i could do that...
...speaking of which, i got the results back from my sleep study. turns out i have mild sleep apnea. i wake about 18 times an hour (healthy is below five, i think). the good news is it's not the dangerous kind, and it's definitely treatable. they gave me three options - surgery, a mouthguard or a CPAP machine. i'm opting for the latter - my friends who have had them swear by them. the tricky part is figuring out when i'm going to be able to go in for the calibration, another overnight stay. probably won't happen until after the musical, though i suppose i could squeeze it in on our two nights off. will have to take another half day - or maybe a whole day. we'll see. at least i can see the light at the end of the tunnel - or rather, the darkness that will let me sleep again.
mom and dad came down to cincy for the flower show last sunday (which they said was horrible and overpriced, in case anyone wondered) and so i introduced them to dewey's pizza and spent some good bonding time. mom found some .99 copies of microserfs which she brought down for me and i picked one up and started rereading again. sometimes i think it's stupid to reread since my list of books i still need to read is so large. but then i got to thinking maybe it's like friends. sometimes it's good to go out, meet some new people. but sometimes you just want to spend time with people you know, people who get you and who you get. it's like that for me with books - sometimes, i just want the familiar instead of the new. enjoying rereading microserfs - amazing how far we've come computer-wise since it came out in 1995. can it really be that long already?
did i mention i'm old?
enough for a friday night. need to go catch up on my backlog of tv, which is only going to get worse the next two weeks. and get some sleep. night.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Stryper - Loud 'n' Clear
via FoxyTunes
i enjoyed myself watching both movies - genuinely funny moments where i laughed out loud and probably rather boisterously. but then afterwards...i questioned just how much i enjoyed them. and i questioned their overall quality. this is probably why i would make a crappy reviewer - i tend to overthink things. isn't it enough to enjoy yourself while watching the movie? isn't it enough just to laugh? but in both cases i caught myself halfway through the movie realizing i didn't buy it. i didn't care at all if peter ended up with either girl because, honestly, i didn't think he deserved either girl (and no, it's not penis envy, thankyouverymuch). and if you couldn't figure out how kate and angela's story was going to end, you just weren't paying attention. i guess that's why i found both movies ultimately unsatisfying - as a series of moments, they were entertaining; as stories, they left me wanting.
confession: if i had to rank them, i'd put baby mama ahead of forgetting sarah marshall. not sure why - maybe it was steve's presence. maybe i find tina much easier on the eyes than jason. who knows. so there. guess they'll take away my elitist card now.
you know what else is hard (please keep your jokes to yourself)? endings. neither film had a satisfying ending to me. writing an ending is tricky business - most of the time they feel like the easy way out or tacked on. rarely do they feel like a part of the story. why do we find it so hard to finish our stories? why are the ideas strong, but the execution weak?
too much thinking for a friday night.
favorite moment from the movie tonight: when kate's mom referred to her being single as "an alternative lifestyle." both painful and funny because it's true.
my life, my normal life anyway, ends this weekend, at least for the next two weeks. load the truck tomorrow, load in at the aronoff on sunday then rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal with audience and show, show, show. i'm exhausted already. i know i'll be in heaven once i'm in it, but i'm dreading it a bit right now because i know it's going to take its toll on me. i'm not so young anymore. sleeping would help, if i could do that...
...speaking of which, i got the results back from my sleep study. turns out i have mild sleep apnea. i wake about 18 times an hour (healthy is below five, i think). the good news is it's not the dangerous kind, and it's definitely treatable. they gave me three options - surgery, a mouthguard or a CPAP machine. i'm opting for the latter - my friends who have had them swear by them. the tricky part is figuring out when i'm going to be able to go in for the calibration, another overnight stay. probably won't happen until after the musical, though i suppose i could squeeze it in on our two nights off. will have to take another half day - or maybe a whole day. we'll see. at least i can see the light at the end of the tunnel - or rather, the darkness that will let me sleep again.
mom and dad came down to cincy for the flower show last sunday (which they said was horrible and overpriced, in case anyone wondered) and so i introduced them to dewey's pizza and spent some good bonding time. mom found some .99 copies of microserfs which she brought down for me and i picked one up and started rereading again. sometimes i think it's stupid to reread since my list of books i still need to read is so large. but then i got to thinking maybe it's like friends. sometimes it's good to go out, meet some new people. but sometimes you just want to spend time with people you know, people who get you and who you get. it's like that for me with books - sometimes, i just want the familiar instead of the new. enjoying rereading microserfs - amazing how far we've come computer-wise since it came out in 1995. can it really be that long already?
did i mention i'm old?
enough for a friday night. need to go catch up on my backlog of tv, which is only going to get worse the next two weeks. and get some sleep. night.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Stryper - Loud 'n' Clear
via FoxyTunes
Saturday, April 26, 2008
saturday
woke up early - early enough to turn on my ipod and lie in bed for an hour before getting up. today was the first time i could make one of the scheduled work days for beauty. good thing too, since each cast member is required to put in at least five hours, so i had to do it all today. since the weather had been so spectacular the past couple of days, i decided i would bike down to the warehouse. i worked out a fairly easy path on a lightly traveled road and headed out. it stormed early in the morning, but was merely cloudy by the time i left my house. took only about 30 minutes. which, unfortunately, meant i had to wait outside for 30 minutes until someone arrived to let me in. i'm sure i freaked out the tenants of the apartments who kept driving out of their gated garage. there were only a handful of us there, so we spent our time painting the sets and set pieces. hopefully we got enough done, though it sounded like this week was going to be quite busy for our tech crew, made worse since from now on we'll be rehearsing at the warehouse and taking up their space.
not sure if i'll bike tomorrow - feeling a little tired after my first ride of the season. but it would definitely help the parking situation. still officially on my mini-break, so no school stuff tomorrow, i could theoretically do it, but not sure i'll to leave that early to get there on time and then ride home afterwards. we'll see how i feel tomorrow.
tried watching a couple of "significant" films tonight i dvr'd this spring - nashville and the great dictator. wasn't in the mood to watch either of them. so instead i pulled out my newsradio season four, the one with my future wife lauren graham in it. such a funny show. jon lovitz was in the first episode and he rarely fails to make me laugh. something about his delivery kills me every time.
actually, not feeling much like writing at the moment. think i'll go watch some more newsradio before falling off to sleep. night.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Archers of Loaf - Sick File
via FoxyTunes
not sure if i'll bike tomorrow - feeling a little tired after my first ride of the season. but it would definitely help the parking situation. still officially on my mini-break, so no school stuff tomorrow, i could theoretically do it, but not sure i'll to leave that early to get there on time and then ride home afterwards. we'll see how i feel tomorrow.
tried watching a couple of "significant" films tonight i dvr'd this spring - nashville and the great dictator. wasn't in the mood to watch either of them. so instead i pulled out my newsradio season four, the one with my future wife lauren graham in it. such a funny show. jon lovitz was in the first episode and he rarely fails to make me laugh. something about his delivery kills me every time.
actually, not feeling much like writing at the moment. think i'll go watch some more newsradio before falling off to sleep. night.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Archers of Loaf - Sick File
via FoxyTunes
Friday, April 25, 2008
neglect
a week goes by. nothing to write. sad, no?
due to the student government state conference taking place at mason, we did not have school today. and i took a personal day yesterday, which means a wonderful four days of freedom. and i couldn't have picked a better couple of days, weather-wise. a little warm for my tastes, but then my "scandinavian" blood finds anything above 70 to be too warm (disclaimer: i have no idea if i'm scandinavian or not - i just prefer cooler temperatures). spent some time doing long-neglected yardwork, which i'm sure made my neighbors happy, as the grotto was looking quite shabby. i've decided i'm not a very good home owner - i lack basic landscaping ability, i am unable to do anything handy and i abhor housework. it's too late now, of course, but maybe i'm one of those people created to rent, like chris from northern exposure (see "Dateline: Cicely", episode 3.11).
my sleep study was last night. fairly uneventful. couldn't fall asleep, woke up a couple of times in the middle of the night (once with a pillow resting on my chest), couldn't fall back asleep, woke up exhausted. so the doctors should have an accurate account of what most of my nights are like. odd sleeping all wired up, but that wasn't why i couldn't sleep. i just hope they were able to discover something so i'll have a direction to head, even if it turns out not to be physical but mental. glad i did it when i didn't have school - would definitely have been late to classes and not in a good state of mind. i wonder if they'd let me watch the videotape of me sleeping. i often wonder what kind of sleeper i am.
people are screaming outside tonight. and there were rumours of weed in the air. that time of year i suppose.
saw forgetting sarah marshall tonight. good film with funny moments. i could have done without the numerous sex jokes/scenes. not sure why it bothered me when other films like it (40-year-old virgin, knocked up) didn't. part of it was the writing - they seemed forced. funny at times, but they didn't come out of the characters or the story. at least i didn't think they did. and i didn't think the main character deserved either of the girls in the film, so the ending was a bit unsatisfying. but i will say this: paul rudd is a genius. stole every scene he was in.
going to spend the day tomorrow at the warehouse putting in my 5 hours of set work. haven't been able to make any of the other work times and this is the last one. think i'm going to ride my bike - directions make it look doable. of course, odds are i'll get caught in the rain that's supposed to come tomorrow, but maybe i'll get lucky. hard to believe april ends next week and the play starts in two. where oh where does the time go?
interesting conversation going on in blogdom about the church and finances and bivocational pastoring. go here for a place to start and follow the links. it's a topic near to my heart, having heard the call of God to leave full-time ministry almost ten years ago now and still struggling with what that looks like for me. i know i took the right journey, as difficult as it was at times, and while i'm not sure there's an ultimate destination, i am sure God has traveled with me and i am where i'm supposed to be. and in the end, that's all we can ask for. those posting bring up many good points and while i don't agree with all they are saying, it's comforting to hear echoes of the thoughts i've wrestled with.
seriously, the screaming can stop any time.
yesterday i had the opportunity to go as a liaison with the st. elizabeth arts foundation to talk with some norwood students about what they would be interested in doing. just happened to work out that i was off and could go. great conversation, but a little sad. most of them have great disdain toward norwood and cannot wait to move out, claiming the school and the community doesn't care about the arts. and judging from the stories they shared, i don't blame them. but then i remember being the same way in high school - i couldn't wait to get out of ohio. and yet here i am again. i'm not sure we'll get them to stay, but we can at least help make them feel their talents are important and appreciated. it sounds like there could be interest in doing some kind of summer production. a musical might be a bit ambitious right now, but possibly some smaller. or even some shakespeare. will have to see what comes of the debriefing tomorrow.
you know, this would be much easier for my readers if i spread this out over the week instead of waiting until friday night and posting an eternal entry. but didn't feel much like posting this week until now. doing it tonight because of the copious amounts of caffeinated beverage flowing through my body. no sleep for thurman tonight.
was reminded today that sometimes it might be good to be married. this struck me as i was wrestling with my queen-sized mattress, trying to flip it before putting my freshly-washed sheets on it. not an easy thing to do on your own. probably a good thing no one could see me. i felt the bible mocking me - two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: if one falls down, his friend can help him up. but pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!
truer words were never spoken.
did i mention the screaming? it's 11:30, people. geesh. makes me wish i had a tranquilizer gun. or a small concussion grenade.
ok, time to go get my battlestar fix. no promises on when i'll write again. hopefully it won't take another 1/2 a fortnight.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Josh Ritter - Girl In The War
via FoxyTunes
due to the student government state conference taking place at mason, we did not have school today. and i took a personal day yesterday, which means a wonderful four days of freedom. and i couldn't have picked a better couple of days, weather-wise. a little warm for my tastes, but then my "scandinavian" blood finds anything above 70 to be too warm (disclaimer: i have no idea if i'm scandinavian or not - i just prefer cooler temperatures). spent some time doing long-neglected yardwork, which i'm sure made my neighbors happy, as the grotto was looking quite shabby. i've decided i'm not a very good home owner - i lack basic landscaping ability, i am unable to do anything handy and i abhor housework. it's too late now, of course, but maybe i'm one of those people created to rent, like chris from northern exposure (see "Dateline: Cicely", episode 3.11).
my sleep study was last night. fairly uneventful. couldn't fall asleep, woke up a couple of times in the middle of the night (once with a pillow resting on my chest), couldn't fall back asleep, woke up exhausted. so the doctors should have an accurate account of what most of my nights are like. odd sleeping all wired up, but that wasn't why i couldn't sleep. i just hope they were able to discover something so i'll have a direction to head, even if it turns out not to be physical but mental. glad i did it when i didn't have school - would definitely have been late to classes and not in a good state of mind. i wonder if they'd let me watch the videotape of me sleeping. i often wonder what kind of sleeper i am.
people are screaming outside tonight. and there were rumours of weed in the air. that time of year i suppose.
saw forgetting sarah marshall tonight. good film with funny moments. i could have done without the numerous sex jokes/scenes. not sure why it bothered me when other films like it (40-year-old virgin, knocked up) didn't. part of it was the writing - they seemed forced. funny at times, but they didn't come out of the characters or the story. at least i didn't think they did. and i didn't think the main character deserved either of the girls in the film, so the ending was a bit unsatisfying. but i will say this: paul rudd is a genius. stole every scene he was in.
going to spend the day tomorrow at the warehouse putting in my 5 hours of set work. haven't been able to make any of the other work times and this is the last one. think i'm going to ride my bike - directions make it look doable. of course, odds are i'll get caught in the rain that's supposed to come tomorrow, but maybe i'll get lucky. hard to believe april ends next week and the play starts in two. where oh where does the time go?
interesting conversation going on in blogdom about the church and finances and bivocational pastoring. go here for a place to start and follow the links. it's a topic near to my heart, having heard the call of God to leave full-time ministry almost ten years ago now and still struggling with what that looks like for me. i know i took the right journey, as difficult as it was at times, and while i'm not sure there's an ultimate destination, i am sure God has traveled with me and i am where i'm supposed to be. and in the end, that's all we can ask for. those posting bring up many good points and while i don't agree with all they are saying, it's comforting to hear echoes of the thoughts i've wrestled with.
seriously, the screaming can stop any time.
yesterday i had the opportunity to go as a liaison with the st. elizabeth arts foundation to talk with some norwood students about what they would be interested in doing. just happened to work out that i was off and could go. great conversation, but a little sad. most of them have great disdain toward norwood and cannot wait to move out, claiming the school and the community doesn't care about the arts. and judging from the stories they shared, i don't blame them. but then i remember being the same way in high school - i couldn't wait to get out of ohio. and yet here i am again. i'm not sure we'll get them to stay, but we can at least help make them feel their talents are important and appreciated. it sounds like there could be interest in doing some kind of summer production. a musical might be a bit ambitious right now, but possibly some smaller. or even some shakespeare. will have to see what comes of the debriefing tomorrow.
you know, this would be much easier for my readers if i spread this out over the week instead of waiting until friday night and posting an eternal entry. but didn't feel much like posting this week until now. doing it tonight because of the copious amounts of caffeinated beverage flowing through my body. no sleep for thurman tonight.
was reminded today that sometimes it might be good to be married. this struck me as i was wrestling with my queen-sized mattress, trying to flip it before putting my freshly-washed sheets on it. not an easy thing to do on your own. probably a good thing no one could see me. i felt the bible mocking me - two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: if one falls down, his friend can help him up. but pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!
truer words were never spoken.
did i mention the screaming? it's 11:30, people. geesh. makes me wish i had a tranquilizer gun. or a small concussion grenade.
ok, time to go get my battlestar fix. no promises on when i'll write again. hopefully it won't take another 1/2 a fortnight.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Josh Ritter - Girl In The War
via FoxyTunes
Friday, April 18, 2008
friday
auditorium teching again. good times. this time mars hill academy is putting on pirates of penzance. i'm intrigued - it's a small "classical and christian school" according to the brochure lying here on the desk. from my understanding, pretty much the entire student body is involved in the production. the sounds coming through the door sound OK, though it seems a bit...slow? which could make for a long night. i'm impressed to see them doing this - many christian schools seem frightened by "secular" art and steer clear. but that does not seem to be the case here. i wonder if they have any connection to my friend amy's school up in dayton - some of what they're doing reminds me of what she talked about.
one of my friends asked me recently if i ever thought about teaching in a christian school and i suppose my initial reaction is i would, but i doubt they'd have me. for one, i'm pricey. secondly, i don't tend to blend well with most christian schools - at least the christian schools i am familiar with - both theologically and politically. i honestly haven't really sought out christian schools, but i suppose if the right circumstances opened up, i wouldn't automatically dismiss it. i do believe christian education has its place, but my experience with it at the high school level has seen more drawbacks than benefits.
so today i took a step that i've talked about for a while but never had the - courage? gumption? to actually act on. i told allen if the opportunity opened up, i would be happy to direct something. so it's out there at least and we'll see what happens. i've hesitated in the past because i respect allen and didn't want him to feel i was trying to encroach on his space. probably all in my head, but still. after i told him, we talked about the construction of the black box theater that's coming in over the next two years, which will allow mason to do even more productions. so who knows. just what i need, yet one more thing to fill my plate with. but it's something i love.
heading up tomorrow to the thurman cafe to meet brent and steve and then meeting possibly others to go visit jeremy's grave. he died a year ago march 29. i purposefully didn't blog about it at the time mostly because i'm not sure i've dealt with it. it seems so distant and unreal even now - it's almost like i have to remind myself he's actually gone and not just out of touch. which seems wrong. i shouldn't have to remind myself, right? i don't know. still. be my second trip up to oakwood (ah the delicious irony of the name). be good to be there with friends again.
after nearly five years of sporadic insomnia, i finally talked to my doctor and he agreed i should have a sleep study done. took a half day on wednesday to visit him and then was able to get in that afternoon to see the clinic and set up the study for next thursday night (we have a "teacher workday" because of the STUGO conference going on next weekend). figure i should see if there is something physical causing my sleeplessness before i look at the mental/lifestyle issues. one of those things you can't figure out living by yourself - i'm too asleep to know if i toss and turn or snore or stop breathing (though i have woken myself up moaning and/or screaming before, which is a bit disconcerting). here's hoping all goes well and i learn at least something.
along with the sleep study, next week is going to be just a bit odd. monday i'm out all day as we finalize how we're going to approach mockingbird. then i'll be in class tuesday and wednesday, then i took a personal day on thursday to give me a good four-day weekend. nothing like a two-day work week, right? of course, trying to figure out what to do with my classes while i'm gone is tricky. tuesday i've got and wednesday too, but monday and thursday are still up in the air. i know where we are in the book, but trying to figure out something my students can do while i'm gone. we'll see.
intermission. lots of people wearing all black running around behind me. i often wonder what they think of me, sitting here, typing away, or, sometimes, just surfing the web. probably something along the lines of "look at that lazy slob sitting there surfing the internet, listening to his ipod. must be nice."
and it is.
cryptic email today from TPTB of beauty and the beast. they had an unscheduled rehearsal wednesday night which i did not go to. it talked about all of the dance and vocal changes made to Gaston, Be Our Guest and the Mob scene. which seems...unlikely? i don't know. he mentioned a handful of names, which makes me wonder if perhaps they were the only ones there on wednesday for the rehearsal - which would suck, of course - and they're having a joke on those of us who didn't show up. i mean, i suppose they could have made changes, but why go through all that just to have to teach it again during our scheduled rehearsal. or maybe i'm just hoping it's a joke so i don't have to learn a bunch of new stuff on sunday. guess i'll find out.
interesting. i just went to the CMT website to get a link for the show and discovered my name is not listed among the ensemble. which lends creedence to my initial suspicion that i was a "late addition" to the cast. not that it matters now...well, not a lot anyway. small bruise to the ego perhaps. i've had far worse. and will have far more.
the fun thing about having all this downtime is i tend to ramble on and on and on and on in my blog post. congratulations for making it this far. feel free to grab a tasty beverage if you need to - i'll still be here typing away.
other things on my mind: been thinking some about what i might like to do with my summer. for the first time since i moved to cincy i have nothing planned - no shows, no schooling, no trips. i suppose i could use the time to fix up things around the house, but i fear that would turn into lots of lying around in my comfy chair or hammock doing nothing which, while appealing, could get old really fast. i've toyed with a couple of road trips - philly/new york, toronto, florida, colorado - but with gas pushing $4 a gallon, it's getting pricey to do that kind of thing. not completely ruled out, but does give me pause. also thought about checking airline flights, but not sure where i'd go. also thought that maybe this summer would be a good time to finally produce my adaptation of Life After God. but i'd need to figure out a schedule and i have no idea if the people i would like to have involved could. first step is probably just to do a call and do a reading of the thing, see who might be interested. not sure when i'd do that, though ideally it should be before the end of the school year.
i don't know. things to think about.
ok, enough of the rambling. i just reread the whole thing and i'm tempted to delete it for lack of any substance. of course, if you're reading this, it means i went ahead and posted it anyway. if all goes well, i should be out of here by 10:30. 11:00 at the latest. two long days in a row (parent teacher conferences and mason's Kiss Me Kate kept me here until almost 10:00 last night). at least i can sleep in tomorrow - don't have to be on the road until 11:00AM. now if i can just sleep through the night....
now playing: "When the foeman bares his steel"
one of my friends asked me recently if i ever thought about teaching in a christian school and i suppose my initial reaction is i would, but i doubt they'd have me. for one, i'm pricey. secondly, i don't tend to blend well with most christian schools - at least the christian schools i am familiar with - both theologically and politically. i honestly haven't really sought out christian schools, but i suppose if the right circumstances opened up, i wouldn't automatically dismiss it. i do believe christian education has its place, but my experience with it at the high school level has seen more drawbacks than benefits.
so today i took a step that i've talked about for a while but never had the - courage? gumption? to actually act on. i told allen if the opportunity opened up, i would be happy to direct something. so it's out there at least and we'll see what happens. i've hesitated in the past because i respect allen and didn't want him to feel i was trying to encroach on his space. probably all in my head, but still. after i told him, we talked about the construction of the black box theater that's coming in over the next two years, which will allow mason to do even more productions. so who knows. just what i need, yet one more thing to fill my plate with. but it's something i love.
heading up tomorrow to the thurman cafe to meet brent and steve and then meeting possibly others to go visit jeremy's grave. he died a year ago march 29. i purposefully didn't blog about it at the time mostly because i'm not sure i've dealt with it. it seems so distant and unreal even now - it's almost like i have to remind myself he's actually gone and not just out of touch. which seems wrong. i shouldn't have to remind myself, right? i don't know. still. be my second trip up to oakwood (ah the delicious irony of the name). be good to be there with friends again.
after nearly five years of sporadic insomnia, i finally talked to my doctor and he agreed i should have a sleep study done. took a half day on wednesday to visit him and then was able to get in that afternoon to see the clinic and set up the study for next thursday night (we have a "teacher workday" because of the STUGO conference going on next weekend). figure i should see if there is something physical causing my sleeplessness before i look at the mental/lifestyle issues. one of those things you can't figure out living by yourself - i'm too asleep to know if i toss and turn or snore or stop breathing (though i have woken myself up moaning and/or screaming before, which is a bit disconcerting). here's hoping all goes well and i learn at least something.
along with the sleep study, next week is going to be just a bit odd. monday i'm out all day as we finalize how we're going to approach mockingbird. then i'll be in class tuesday and wednesday, then i took a personal day on thursday to give me a good four-day weekend. nothing like a two-day work week, right? of course, trying to figure out what to do with my classes while i'm gone is tricky. tuesday i've got and wednesday too, but monday and thursday are still up in the air. i know where we are in the book, but trying to figure out something my students can do while i'm gone. we'll see.
intermission. lots of people wearing all black running around behind me. i often wonder what they think of me, sitting here, typing away, or, sometimes, just surfing the web. probably something along the lines of "look at that lazy slob sitting there surfing the internet, listening to his ipod. must be nice."
and it is.
cryptic email today from TPTB of beauty and the beast. they had an unscheduled rehearsal wednesday night which i did not go to. it talked about all of the dance and vocal changes made to Gaston, Be Our Guest and the Mob scene. which seems...unlikely? i don't know. he mentioned a handful of names, which makes me wonder if perhaps they were the only ones there on wednesday for the rehearsal - which would suck, of course - and they're having a joke on those of us who didn't show up. i mean, i suppose they could have made changes, but why go through all that just to have to teach it again during our scheduled rehearsal. or maybe i'm just hoping it's a joke so i don't have to learn a bunch of new stuff on sunday. guess i'll find out.
interesting. i just went to the CMT website to get a link for the show and discovered my name is not listed among the ensemble. which lends creedence to my initial suspicion that i was a "late addition" to the cast. not that it matters now...well, not a lot anyway. small bruise to the ego perhaps. i've had far worse. and will have far more.
the fun thing about having all this downtime is i tend to ramble on and on and on and on in my blog post. congratulations for making it this far. feel free to grab a tasty beverage if you need to - i'll still be here typing away.
other things on my mind: been thinking some about what i might like to do with my summer. for the first time since i moved to cincy i have nothing planned - no shows, no schooling, no trips. i suppose i could use the time to fix up things around the house, but i fear that would turn into lots of lying around in my comfy chair or hammock doing nothing which, while appealing, could get old really fast. i've toyed with a couple of road trips - philly/new york, toronto, florida, colorado - but with gas pushing $4 a gallon, it's getting pricey to do that kind of thing. not completely ruled out, but does give me pause. also thought about checking airline flights, but not sure where i'd go. also thought that maybe this summer would be a good time to finally produce my adaptation of Life After God. but i'd need to figure out a schedule and i have no idea if the people i would like to have involved could. first step is probably just to do a call and do a reading of the thing, see who might be interested. not sure when i'd do that, though ideally it should be before the end of the school year.
i don't know. things to think about.
ok, enough of the rambling. i just reread the whole thing and i'm tempted to delete it for lack of any substance. of course, if you're reading this, it means i went ahead and posted it anyway. if all goes well, i should be out of here by 10:30. 11:00 at the latest. two long days in a row (parent teacher conferences and mason's Kiss Me Kate kept me here until almost 10:00 last night). at least i can sleep in tomorrow - don't have to be on the road until 11:00AM. now if i can just sleep through the night....
now playing: "When the foeman bares his steel"
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
utensils are stealing my ideas
lots going on, but the usually the only time i have to sit down and type up stuff is after a rehearsal and i'm a bit wiped after all that happens.
in case you were looking for excuses....
a snapshot of how things have been lately: saturday i found myself unable to go anywhere because friday night my garage door jammed six inches from the ground and would not close and when it tried to correct itself and go back up, my automatic opener ripped out of the door. and of course my car was in the garage, so i couldn't get it out. i finally unplugged the thing and using old-fashioned elbow grease, got the door back open. and so far i've been unsuccessful at finding anyone to help me, either with the door or with the opener. guess it's back to ye olden days of (gasp) manually opening my garage. joy.
friday was the third annual mason film festival. we doubled in size as far as films (eight this year) and had nearly five times the audience we've had in the past (over 50). sad moment: i was unable to show one of the submitted films because it did not meet the PG-13 criteria by dropping the f-bomb several times in the first couple of minutes. luckily i found it before i showed it. hated to cut it, but as a school sponsored event, i could not take the chance, especially with all that's been going on in the district lately. but even with that, the films submitted were wonderfully enjoyable. now if we can continue to build on this, i think we'll have something special in the coming years.
so tomorrow i'm only teaching half a day because i have a doctor's appointment. yes, after five years, i am (ooh, wait for it) officially (you know it's coming) tired of my insomnia (ah, i slay me). so i'm going to see if my doctor can recommend a sleep study so i can see if there's something physically wrong with me keeping me from getting a good night's sleep. here's hoping. i have a window of opportunity next week with the special teacher's work day that will allow me to take part. i suppose i could always go during the school week and be late to school, but i'd rather not have to worry about doing anything the next day, knowwhatimean?
heading up to columbus this weekend for our delayed trip to visit jeremy's grave. be good to go up there again. will get my thurman fix, which has been a long time coming. just wish i could stay up there longer - need to come back to cincy that night of our rescheduled MST3K party. so a busy, busy saturday. and if all goes well, i should have no grading to worry about. there's something new.
ok, think i'm going to try and get some sleep. last couple of nights i have been less than successful, unable to fall asleep, waking up exhausted in the middle of the night, only able to get out of bed by sheer force of will. now you see why i'm going to the doctor tomorrow. hope i get some good news.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Vigilantes Of Love - Baalam's Ass
via FoxyTunes
in case you were looking for excuses....
a snapshot of how things have been lately: saturday i found myself unable to go anywhere because friday night my garage door jammed six inches from the ground and would not close and when it tried to correct itself and go back up, my automatic opener ripped out of the door. and of course my car was in the garage, so i couldn't get it out. i finally unplugged the thing and using old-fashioned elbow grease, got the door back open. and so far i've been unsuccessful at finding anyone to help me, either with the door or with the opener. guess it's back to ye olden days of (gasp) manually opening my garage. joy.
friday was the third annual mason film festival. we doubled in size as far as films (eight this year) and had nearly five times the audience we've had in the past (over 50). sad moment: i was unable to show one of the submitted films because it did not meet the PG-13 criteria by dropping the f-bomb several times in the first couple of minutes. luckily i found it before i showed it. hated to cut it, but as a school sponsored event, i could not take the chance, especially with all that's been going on in the district lately. but even with that, the films submitted were wonderfully enjoyable. now if we can continue to build on this, i think we'll have something special in the coming years.
so tomorrow i'm only teaching half a day because i have a doctor's appointment. yes, after five years, i am (ooh, wait for it) officially (you know it's coming) tired of my insomnia (ah, i slay me). so i'm going to see if my doctor can recommend a sleep study so i can see if there's something physically wrong with me keeping me from getting a good night's sleep. here's hoping. i have a window of opportunity next week with the special teacher's work day that will allow me to take part. i suppose i could always go during the school week and be late to school, but i'd rather not have to worry about doing anything the next day, knowwhatimean?
heading up to columbus this weekend for our delayed trip to visit jeremy's grave. be good to go up there again. will get my thurman fix, which has been a long time coming. just wish i could stay up there longer - need to come back to cincy that night of our rescheduled MST3K party. so a busy, busy saturday. and if all goes well, i should have no grading to worry about. there's something new.
ok, think i'm going to try and get some sleep. last couple of nights i have been less than successful, unable to fall asleep, waking up exhausted in the middle of the night, only able to get out of bed by sheer force of will. now you see why i'm going to the doctor tomorrow. hope i get some good news.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: Vigilantes Of Love - Baalam's Ass
via FoxyTunes
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
i'm draining phlegm
hallelujah.
nothing like a spring cold to suck the words out of you. felt bad enough yesterday that i didn't go to rehearsal (that and i thought it a bad idea to infect the rest of the cast). needed a night to rest, which seemed to work, since i felt better today, though still not completely over it. and i need to be heading to bed so i don't make it worse again. but wanted to stop by and say hey.
we ran the whole show tonight. seems early to be doing so, but then i can't remember my previous experiences, so i don't know if running the show a month out is normal or not. guess it depends on the group. no major trainwrecks - some timing issues with dialogue and the music. i screwed up my scene with belle - couldn't follow the timing in the music. i'm sure i'll get a note about it. at least. oh, and it turns out i'm not a corkscrew after all. i'm an egg beater. also discovered that there was a snafu with the costumes and the corkscrew and the egg beater weren't ordered. so we're making those. maybe i'll get to keep it after its over...though why i would do that i have no idea.
find of the week: went to half price books over in colerain and they had a dvd copy of the original cast production of Into the Woods. i had (possibly still have?) a copy i taped off PBS back in college that i wore out watching. not sure how it ended up at half price books - who gets rid of that kind of thing? - but i'm certainly glad it did. one of my favorite musicals. maybe someday i'll get to be a part of a production. who knows.
there are other things i could share, but wisdom says sleep is more important when you're trying to recover from a cold. need to go take my shot of nyquill and hope it lets me sleep through the night. we'll see if i can't post something else tomorrow after house church - we moved to thursdays to accommodate my B&B schedule. the joys of small church. night.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: October Project - Where You Are
via FoxyTunes
nothing like a spring cold to suck the words out of you. felt bad enough yesterday that i didn't go to rehearsal (that and i thought it a bad idea to infect the rest of the cast). needed a night to rest, which seemed to work, since i felt better today, though still not completely over it. and i need to be heading to bed so i don't make it worse again. but wanted to stop by and say hey.
we ran the whole show tonight. seems early to be doing so, but then i can't remember my previous experiences, so i don't know if running the show a month out is normal or not. guess it depends on the group. no major trainwrecks - some timing issues with dialogue and the music. i screwed up my scene with belle - couldn't follow the timing in the music. i'm sure i'll get a note about it. at least. oh, and it turns out i'm not a corkscrew after all. i'm an egg beater. also discovered that there was a snafu with the costumes and the corkscrew and the egg beater weren't ordered. so we're making those. maybe i'll get to keep it after its over...though why i would do that i have no idea.
find of the week: went to half price books over in colerain and they had a dvd copy of the original cast production of Into the Woods. i had (possibly still have?) a copy i taped off PBS back in college that i wore out watching. not sure how it ended up at half price books - who gets rid of that kind of thing? - but i'm certainly glad it did. one of my favorite musicals. maybe someday i'll get to be a part of a production. who knows.
there are other things i could share, but wisdom says sleep is more important when you're trying to recover from a cold. need to go take my shot of nyquill and hope it lets me sleep through the night. we'll see if i can't post something else tomorrow after house church - we moved to thursdays to accommodate my B&B schedule. the joys of small church. night.
Æ
----------------
Now playing: October Project - Where You Are
via FoxyTunes
Thursday, April 03, 2008
weekend is almost here
sitting in the auditorium at the middle school, trying to simultaneously avoid grading and the community theater production of The Odd Couple, the female version. both are equally painful, though at this point, i'd take the grading over the production, judging from sounds emanating from behind the closed door.
done teaching for the week - tomorrow i get to spend the day at the white house (our curriculum space) working on stuff for sophomore year. don't want to talk about it at the moment and am not sure it would be wise to do so here since so many at school know about this space. though i certainly have some stuff i'd like to sort out - and i even toyed with turning on comments, just to see what people thought of the issue.
intrigued? i shouldn't say more, but know the issue is not uncommon in english education and one i don't think we'll ever get away from. i just hope we do the right thing instead of the expedient thing.
and i've probably said too much already.
heading out tomorrow night with the writer's group from this summer. will probably need the time after tomorrow's adventure. did i say time? i meant alcohol ; ) going somewhere new to me - habits over in oakley. read a couple of reviews. sounds like a decent place. and can't be as crowded as The Pub was last time. i just hope i'm awake. been one of those weeks - not enough sleep, tired most of the time. you'd think i'd learn you can never catch up. you'd think wrong.
B&B rehearsal went well this week. we ran act one for the second time - infinitely better this time around. helps we've had a bit more repetition lately. i know it's the way i learn best. act two is this weekend. need to spend some time practicing with the rehearsal cd (now rehearsal mp3s). i'm fine when we just sing, but not so much when we sing, dance and act. we'll get there. got some of our props this week, which, because we have no where to store them, become the responsibility of the actor. so i have a tray of the ugliest baked goods you've ever seen in the trunk of my car. glad the audience is far away.
other good news: the other corkscrew and i have been added back to part of "be our guest." they needed us to help move some of the set, so we get to come on for the soft shoe portion. glad we paid attention and learned it just in case. so no more whining from me about lack of stage time.
sounds like the play might be over. time to start packing things up so i can get home and grab some sleep before tomorrow. going to need it.
Æ
now playing: phil keaggy - baby blue.
done teaching for the week - tomorrow i get to spend the day at the white house (our curriculum space) working on stuff for sophomore year. don't want to talk about it at the moment and am not sure it would be wise to do so here since so many at school know about this space. though i certainly have some stuff i'd like to sort out - and i even toyed with turning on comments, just to see what people thought of the issue.
intrigued? i shouldn't say more, but know the issue is not uncommon in english education and one i don't think we'll ever get away from. i just hope we do the right thing instead of the expedient thing.
and i've probably said too much already.
heading out tomorrow night with the writer's group from this summer. will probably need the time after tomorrow's adventure. did i say time? i meant alcohol ; ) going somewhere new to me - habits over in oakley. read a couple of reviews. sounds like a decent place. and can't be as crowded as The Pub was last time. i just hope i'm awake. been one of those weeks - not enough sleep, tired most of the time. you'd think i'd learn you can never catch up. you'd think wrong.
B&B rehearsal went well this week. we ran act one for the second time - infinitely better this time around. helps we've had a bit more repetition lately. i know it's the way i learn best. act two is this weekend. need to spend some time practicing with the rehearsal cd (now rehearsal mp3s). i'm fine when we just sing, but not so much when we sing, dance and act. we'll get there. got some of our props this week, which, because we have no where to store them, become the responsibility of the actor. so i have a tray of the ugliest baked goods you've ever seen in the trunk of my car. glad the audience is far away.
other good news: the other corkscrew and i have been added back to part of "be our guest." they needed us to help move some of the set, so we get to come on for the soft shoe portion. glad we paid attention and learned it just in case. so no more whining from me about lack of stage time.
sounds like the play might be over. time to start packing things up so i can get home and grab some sleep before tomorrow. going to need it.
Æ
now playing: phil keaggy - baby blue.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
birthday shoutouts, part deux
had a fantastic dinner/dessert with gina and the novotnis. love me some dewey's. and some graeter's. so good. glad there are no calories on your birthday...
some more well wishers:
via snail mail card:
gina
steve, becky and uly
via phone call:
dad and mom
candice
via text message:
anne
shannon
via email:
sarah
andie
karen
and in her first ever appearance in my email box - my sister, jen. yes she finally broke down after years and got a computer. now i can send her all kinds of annoying forwards...
an excellent birthday. thanks to everyone who helped make it great. now i need to head to bed - christina (my student teacher) is going to a job fair tomorrow, so i have to teach all of my bells. whatever shall i do...?
----------------
Now playing: Weird Al Yankovic - White & Nerdy
via FoxyTunes
some more well wishers:
via snail mail card:
gina
steve, becky and uly
via phone call:
dad and mom
candice
via text message:
anne
shannon
via email:
sarah
andie
karen
and in her first ever appearance in my email box - my sister, jen. yes she finally broke down after years and got a computer. now i can send her all kinds of annoying forwards...
an excellent birthday. thanks to everyone who helped make it great. now i need to head to bed - christina (my student teacher) is going to a job fair tomorrow, so i have to teach all of my bells. whatever shall i do...?
----------------
Now playing: Weird Al Yankovic - White & Nerdy
via FoxyTunes
you say it's your birthday?
it's my birthday too!
no great epiphanies on entering my 39th year of existence. 38 down, only God knows how many to go. we'll see what happens.
headed to dewey's to get my free pint glass tonight, then to graeter's for my free ice cream and then to rehearsal for...well, lots of standing around i think. but before i head off to paint the town a hazy shade of rouge, i wanted to send a shout out to all those who took the time to remember me on my special day - well, special except for the 18 million or so people that share my birthday with me (yes, i was geeky enough to look it up - 17,995,207. give or take a few thousand).
via my surprise party back in march:
bethany and andy
brent
steve and angela
nikki
mike and andrea (via phone)
via actual snail mail cards:
jenna
andy
ruthie
bea
jay
best buy
via email:
shannon
kat
sam
brian
ang
rhonda
robin
john
city barbeque
if you haven't sent your wishes yet, you still have eight hours or so to do so.
does that sound desperate?
ok, off to suck the marrow out of my birthday. more after rehearsal if i'm not too drunk to type (i kid, i kid).
Æ
ps how appropriate that this is the song playing for me today...
----------------
Now playing: Adam Ant - Goodie Two Shoes
via FoxyTunes
no great epiphanies on entering my 39th year of existence. 38 down, only God knows how many to go. we'll see what happens.
headed to dewey's to get my free pint glass tonight, then to graeter's for my free ice cream and then to rehearsal for...well, lots of standing around i think. but before i head off to paint the town a hazy shade of rouge, i wanted to send a shout out to all those who took the time to remember me on my special day - well, special except for the 18 million or so people that share my birthday with me (yes, i was geeky enough to look it up - 17,995,207. give or take a few thousand).
via my surprise party back in march:
bethany and andy
brent
steve and angela
nikki
mike and andrea (via phone)
via actual snail mail cards:
jenna
andy
ruthie
bea
jay
best buy
via email:
shannon
kat
sam
brian
ang
rhonda
robin
john
city barbeque
if you haven't sent your wishes yet, you still have eight hours or so to do so.
does that sound desperate?
ok, off to suck the marrow out of my birthday. more after rehearsal if i'm not too drunk to type (i kid, i kid).
Æ
ps how appropriate that this is the song playing for me today...
----------------
Now playing: Adam Ant - Goodie Two Shoes
via FoxyTunes
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