hyperbole, anyone?

been thinking about my last post and the idea of finding contentment in God. and perhaps i would do well to remember something - context. the passage was from the psalms - poetry. not a rule on how to live one's life, though that is often how they are interpreted. and, ironically enough, in this psalm, the writer is looking at the how the wicked prosper and seem to get everything they want while the righteous do not - something i've often felt in my own life. the point? the passage i struggled with isn't meant to be taken literally - it's not that God is all we should desire. but when you compare the glory of God to the desires of the earth - it's no contest. God wins, every time. has to, or else, not much of a God, no?

justification so i can have my cake and eat it too? maybe. but doesn't feel that way to me.

yeah, i know - it's after 11:15 and i should be in bed. but i met the fam to celebrate mom's birthday tonight and i drank way too much tea and ate too much chocolate to even see sleep coming in the next couple of hours. so here i am, subjecting you to my caffeine-spiked thoughts. i'll try to not too be too out there.

waiting. was going to write on this, but yesterday, while dozing in my comfy chair, a thought came to me, one i've heard before but conveniently forgot, as i tend to do when it's something i don't like. i seem stuck in the idea of waiting as sitting around, hoping something comes along. a passive waiting. but that's not how life works. and it certainly isn't something the Bible recommends. Christ points to an ACTIVE waiting. we're not meant to stand around with our arms out, waiting for God to drop whatever comes next into our laps. no, God wants us to be actively waiting, to realize God provides, but sometimes He needs us to walk around the corner. or position ourselves to better receive the blessing waiting for us. i don't know why i continue to think God will provide if i just sit here and wait long enough. you would think 35 years would have taught me it doesn't work that way. no such luck.

advent is full of active waiting. simeon was waiting for the messiah, but he didn't stay at home - he went to the temple every day, waiting for God to show him what he was waiting for. the shepherds didn't sit in their fields hoping joseph and mary would bring the child to them - they left and found what the world had been waiting for since the beginning. and the wise men came from distant lands to find what the was waiting under the star.

father, i pray this season will be for me a time of active waiting, of finding the dark places where your grace hides, waiting for me to find it. i pray it will be a turning in my own life. no more sitting around and whining because i've been waiting for so long. need to start trusting that my waiting is not in vain, but that it also isn't meant to be passive. ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. but i have to take a step: ask. seek. knock. God has made the first move - i need to follow His lead.

wow. i need to get hopped up on caffeine more often. though i wonder if what i'm writing actually will make sense in the morning....

eighteen minutes until dec. 1. one of my personal anniversaries. i'll write about it tomorrow. no use burning out now. and the daily office is calling. and my pillow, though i don't believe i'll be sleeping much...
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Tunes: old 97's - goin' goin' gone