The word for today is awesome. I'm feeling absolutely great. Exhausted, but great. After a restful sleep at the church (a thousand times better than the bus), we got up and had a light breakfast. Then we headed down to the Monterey Bay Aquarium. It was wonderfully fascinating. The aquarium is one of the best in the world. It focuses only on the marine life in Monterey Bay. The most interesting exhibit was the kelp forest, the only place where kelp is found inside. The aquarium is filled with water right from the Bay, brought in through pumps that used to be used for the cannery there. It was great to see the sea life that we'll be gong by on our ride. And it even came in handy today, the first day of biking.
After the tour of the aquarium and all the "critters," we met together and prepared for our riding by going over the rules of etiquette and some safety precautions. Then we split up into seven groups. My group, which I personally feel is the best, is Randy Cronk, group leader, Dennis Bailey, Tim Pressler, Chip Wall, Scott Jones and Ed Hardnett. We started from the church and rode around Pebble Beach to Carmel. In between was some of the most beautiful scenery I've ever seen. We saw gorgeous shorelines, beautiful sunsets and breathtaking mountains. At one of our many stops, we saw a rock covered with sea lions. On shore the body of a sea lion (dead) washed up on shore. Once again I was able to see man's works against God's and God one hands down. Gorgeous houses and scenic golf courses (and houses with golf course on their front yards) and fancy cars galore.
But the coast and the life and the beauty of nature are what I'll remember always. All the scenery alone would have made the trip fantastic, but the group I rode with made it awesome (yeah!). Dr. Cronk stopped often enough so we could get pictures and make sure we took in everything (no, I'm not brown-nosing, thank you). The rest of the guys were helpful and hilarious and helped make the trip great (hey, a little alliteration never hurt anyone).
We stopped by the Carmel Mission when we got in town, but it was closed. Hopefully, we'll get to go tomorrow. Tonight we're staying in a youth center. Class was great tonight. Again, it wasn't so much the lesson but the getting together and sharing. I'll never look at mushrooms the same again. I really haven't seen much of Mike and Laurie today, but for some reason it's not bothering me as much. The only problems now are that I haven't written my friends back home (I can't find stamps) and that I'm beat. We start at 9:00 AM tomorrow and go 35-40 miles. Well, time for bed! More tomorrow (if I survive!) Æ
Tunes: king's x - we are finding who we are (live)
Saturday, January 07, 2006
Friday, January 06, 2006
Wandering Wheels - 6 January 1991
Goodness gracious, we had yet on one more jam-packed day today. Last night about 1:00 AM we crossed into wild and wonderful California! Unfortunately, they confiscated all of our apples on the bus (which were the only things keeping me from spending twice as much on food).
By the time I woke up in the morning, we were well into California and on our way to Santa Cruz, where we spent most of our day. First we stopped at the Natural Bridge National Park, which was a nesting place for the Monarch Butterfly during winter. It was wild, because they clustered together and looked like a group of dead leaves. They mostly slept, 'cause it was too cold for them to fly or even move. From there we hopped on the bus and drove to Long Marine Laboratory, which is owned by UCSC. There was a skeleton of a blue whale there, as well as various sea creatures which we could pick up and touch, like star fish and sea anemone. We almost go to see the dolphins and see elephants, but hey turned us away at the door (bummer).
From there we went to the Henry Cowell Redwoods State Park to look at the giant redwoods. It was incredible! It amazed me how old and how big they were. After Las Vegas, it was interesting that God's monuments are much more breathtaking than man's. I could have spent hours in the woods just walking around. This trip is truly showing me the wonders of God's earth. I'm so excited about riding down the coast. It's going to be great.
On the way to Monterey (which is where I am now), I saw a beautiful sunset. Unfortunately, I was unable to get a picture since we were in the bus at the time. I sure hope I get some pictures before this trip ends. Anyway, I'm staying at the First Baptist Church of Monterey. We got our first taste of Wheel's cooking and it was wonderful. We learned a couple of songs to sing in the service and I "testified" about the trip out. I love sharing in churches. It's great meeting people and it's a great feeling to know that people are thinking about you on the trip.
After a movie on Wheels, we had our first class session. It last half an hour and was really pretty interesting. Dr. Cronk read from All I Ever Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten and talked about how we need to not just sit around and say it's all been done. These session will be a good time I feel.
Then (I told you this day was packed) we all hit the Bay, cannery Row. We walked along the beach and had a wonderful time. Mike was walking on the rocks and got stuck out in the middle when the tide came in. I laughed so hard. It was very amusing (at least to me). Then we walked around the town a little. For some reason I'm still feeling like a third wheel around Mike and Laurie. I think it's just because they're so close and I realize I'm not part of that. I'm continuing to get to know more of the Taylor people, which is fun and exciting. A few more people joined us today and we finally have everyone here. Tomorrow we bike for the first time. I can't wait! Ɔ
Tunes: breathe - how can i fall
By the time I woke up in the morning, we were well into California and on our way to Santa Cruz, where we spent most of our day. First we stopped at the Natural Bridge National Park, which was a nesting place for the Monarch Butterfly during winter. It was wild, because they clustered together and looked like a group of dead leaves. They mostly slept, 'cause it was too cold for them to fly or even move. From there we hopped on the bus and drove to Long Marine Laboratory, which is owned by UCSC. There was a skeleton of a blue whale there, as well as various sea creatures which we could pick up and touch, like star fish and sea anemone. We almost go to see the dolphins and see elephants, but hey turned us away at the door (bummer).
From there we went to the Henry Cowell Redwoods State Park to look at the giant redwoods. It was incredible! It amazed me how old and how big they were. After Las Vegas, it was interesting that God's monuments are much more breathtaking than man's. I could have spent hours in the woods just walking around. This trip is truly showing me the wonders of God's earth. I'm so excited about riding down the coast. It's going to be great.
On the way to Monterey (which is where I am now), I saw a beautiful sunset. Unfortunately, I was unable to get a picture since we were in the bus at the time. I sure hope I get some pictures before this trip ends. Anyway, I'm staying at the First Baptist Church of Monterey. We got our first taste of Wheel's cooking and it was wonderful. We learned a couple of songs to sing in the service and I "testified" about the trip out. I love sharing in churches. It's great meeting people and it's a great feeling to know that people are thinking about you on the trip.
After a movie on Wheels, we had our first class session. It last half an hour and was really pretty interesting. Dr. Cronk read from All I Ever Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten and talked about how we need to not just sit around and say it's all been done. These session will be a good time I feel.
Then (I told you this day was packed) we all hit the Bay, cannery Row. We walked along the beach and had a wonderful time. Mike was walking on the rocks and got stuck out in the middle when the tide came in. I laughed so hard. It was very amusing (at least to me). Then we walked around the town a little. For some reason I'm still feeling like a third wheel around Mike and Laurie. I think it's just because they're so close and I realize I'm not part of that. I'm continuing to get to know more of the Taylor people, which is fun and exciting. A few more people joined us today and we finally have everyone here. Tomorrow we bike for the first time. I can't wait! Ɔ
Tunes: breathe - how can i fall
i am so not here today
school, that is.
i mean, physically i'm here, but my brain is somewhere else completely at the moment. the only problem is, i'm not sure where it is. i at least hope it's having a good time, maybe sipping cocktails on a beach somewhere, or enjoying a walk outside in the woods on the side of a mountain. if it's not here, it might as well be enjoying itself.
been pondering resolutions and for whatever reason i can't seem to come up with any. i mean, eat better, exercise more, blahty blahty blah, but i'm really not feeling resolute at the moment (yes, i know, improper use of the word. i'm being witty. or at least i think i am). to quote calvin:
"See, in order to improve oneself, one must have some idea of what's "good." That implies certain values. But as we all know, values are relative. Every system of belief is equally valid and we need to tolerate diversity. Virtue isn't "better" than vice. It's just different. I refuse to be victimized by notions of virtuous behavior."
To which hobbes replies, "I don't know if I can tolerate that much tolerance."
seriously, bill watterson is a genius.
i'm quickly realizing the posting of my thoughts from the bike trip are more than just a bit on the painful side, as i'm sure everyone has realized. ah well. i toyed with the idea of keeping a snarkastic commentary along with them, to take some of the sting out, but really, what does it matter? not like there's anything there that most people reading this don't already know. i mean really, did anyone expect that it would be all daisies and butterflies? i am a bit disturbed by some of the parallels to my life now. i sincerely believe i've grown and changed as a person, but reading these entries makes me wonder at time. at least i'm consistent, right?
i remember in high school hearing my youth pastor describe me as a buoy - up and down, but always consistently in the same place, setting boundaries. guess it's better than a yo-yo. :) i've always been drawn to the quote by walpole: "Life is a tragedy for those who feel, but a comedy to those who think." i realize i lean heavily, especially in my writing, to the tragedy side. but there are parts of life i find freaking hilarious. i hope as i've grown older i've moved to the center of these ideas. but too often i stray to feeling instead of thinking.
maybe i should resolve to think more in the coming year.
hmmm, that doesn't sound like a good idea. maybe feel less?
maybe get over myself (and suddenly all my readers go "YES! That one!").
meeting after school. then janet and matt are coming over at 8:00 to do a little rehearsal for sunday's celebration. hopefully i don't crash too hard before all that is done. gotta love fridays.
better go make sure i'm ready for fourth bell. at least they're taking a test. and here's hoping fifth bell isn't completely out of control. please oh please oh please....
Æ
Tunes: beck - oh maria
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Wandering Wheels - 5 January 1991
So much to say, so little time. My was this a full day. And an empty day. First stop today was the Grand Canyon. The scenery on the way in was gorgeous. It;s amazing how beautiful things can be when they're different. We stopped along the South Rim of the canyon to see...and all we saw was fog. The only time I've ever been or may ever be at one of the most beautiful places in the U.S. and I can't see it.
The best part was that we finally got to take showers. Boy, do I feel a lot better now!
Not being able to see the Canyone sort of put a damper on the rest of the day. Here we are again, talking about expectations not being reached. Actually, a lot of this trip so far has been failed expectations, which, of course, means that I probably set my expectations too high. It's hard to write this right now because I'm feeling depressed (again). And I hate myself for it. All I do is whine all the time about what I'm not getting to do, not feeling how I want to. I'm ruining my trip. And even now I'm doing it. Enough.
We got to see an IMAX theater presentation about the Grand Canyon, which was great. At least I got to see the Canyon that way. From there we headed to Las Vegas. On the way, Mike an I wasted Laurie and Ed in euchre, which was amusing. Then, just as I was finishing The Shining, we drove over the Hoover Dam. It was incredible! Hard to believe something man made can look that beautiful The bus stopped on the other side and we all got off the bus. And just then they turned out all the lights! So much for pictures.
So we all jumped ack on the bus and headed to Las Vegas. Coming out of the mountains and seeing all the lights was great. But to be honest I hated Las Vegas. It was so depressing. All the excesses, all the lonely people, all the waste. My head seriously hurt when I was done. As far as groups go, I'm starting to get to know more people, which is nice. However, I feel like I'm alienating myself (being alienated?) from Mike and Laurie. There's that vicious circle again. I'm depressed because I'm not included but I'm not included because I'm depressed. Arrghh! I hate this. you'd think I'd beat this by now. No such luck. Maybe I'll get some insight on this trip. I hope and pray so. Æ
The best part was that we finally got to take showers. Boy, do I feel a lot better now!
Not being able to see the Canyone sort of put a damper on the rest of the day. Here we are again, talking about expectations not being reached. Actually, a lot of this trip so far has been failed expectations, which, of course, means that I probably set my expectations too high. It's hard to write this right now because I'm feeling depressed (again). And I hate myself for it. All I do is whine all the time about what I'm not getting to do, not feeling how I want to. I'm ruining my trip. And even now I'm doing it. Enough.
We got to see an IMAX theater presentation about the Grand Canyon, which was great. At least I got to see the Canyon that way. From there we headed to Las Vegas. On the way, Mike an I wasted Laurie and Ed in euchre, which was amusing. Then, just as I was finishing The Shining, we drove over the Hoover Dam. It was incredible! Hard to believe something man made can look that beautiful The bus stopped on the other side and we all got off the bus. And just then they turned out all the lights! So much for pictures.
So we all jumped ack on the bus and headed to Las Vegas. Coming out of the mountains and seeing all the lights was great. But to be honest I hated Las Vegas. It was so depressing. All the excesses, all the lonely people, all the waste. My head seriously hurt when I was done. As far as groups go, I'm starting to get to know more people, which is nice. However, I feel like I'm alienating myself (being alienated?) from Mike and Laurie. There's that vicious circle again. I'm depressed because I'm not included but I'm not included because I'm depressed. Arrghh! I hate this. you'd think I'd beat this by now. No such luck. Maybe I'll get some insight on this trip. I hope and pray so. Æ
Tunes: luna - new haven comet
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Wandering Wheels - 4 January 1991
(if nothing else, this journal will help me keep track of the date!)
Time to write again. Gee, it's the second day and already this sounds like a routine. I hope it doesn't end up being how it sounds. I honestly thought I wouldn't have much to talk about today. Hours upon hours of riding on a bus can be monotonous, especially when you write about it in a journal. But a couple of things have been going through my head. First is about my self-concept. And expectations. Actually, this silly journal has something to do with it. I think I think I'm some great thinker occasionally, that in the future people are going to read this and go, "Wow. What a deep person. And what fascinating insights into life he has." But more and more recently I'm realizing that I'm not as important as I think I am or will be or have been. I'm just (God forbid) AVERAGE. Well, maybe a little aove, but not too much. And that's scary. Funny thing is, I still think I could change it. And who knows, maybe I will. Right now I'm not doing near enough, if anything. And THAT'S scary. Life sucks when you don't live up to your own expectations.
But I think I'll stop floating around on that big sea of self-pity now. As I now write this, I'm farther West than I have ever been. I've been in Texas for the first time and by the time I write again tomorrow, I'll have seen the Grand Canyon (and there was much rejoicing). Actually, right now we're approx. 1000 miles from L.A. (ooh, exciting). Ah, but I digress.
We stopped at a mall in Amarillo, TX and were told to be back by 8:30 (Texas time, that is). Laurie, Mike and I were going to eat in the mall but decided (actually, our wallets decided) we'd eat at Burger King across the road. So we had a nice meal and then sat around talking for a while. Then about 8:10 (TX time) we decided to head back. What we didn't realize was taht everyone else had decided they wanted to go to another mall, since the one we'd stopped at was for the most part closed. So as we walked across the ice slickened streets of Amarillo, the bus, filled with all the other students who had be waiting for us to return so they could get to their shopping, drove toward us and picked us up. I had mixed feelings about it. We hadn't done anything wrong. I mean, how were we supposed to know everyone else wanted to blow the joint and that we were holding them up? Yet at the same time I felt guilty for making EVERYONE wait. In fact, I sat in the bus instead of going into the second mall because of it. But I'm still convinced I did nothing wrong. Ah, these pesky moral dilemmas. As I close, I thought I'd let whoever reads this know that Laurie has decided that she will not defecate for the entire month. Should be a L-O-N-G month. Æ
Time to write again. Gee, it's the second day and already this sounds like a routine. I hope it doesn't end up being how it sounds. I honestly thought I wouldn't have much to talk about today. Hours upon hours of riding on a bus can be monotonous, especially when you write about it in a journal. But a couple of things have been going through my head. First is about my self-concept. And expectations. Actually, this silly journal has something to do with it. I think I think I'm some great thinker occasionally, that in the future people are going to read this and go, "Wow. What a deep person. And what fascinating insights into life he has." But more and more recently I'm realizing that I'm not as important as I think I am or will be or have been. I'm just (God forbid) AVERAGE. Well, maybe a little aove, but not too much. And that's scary. Funny thing is, I still think I could change it. And who knows, maybe I will. Right now I'm not doing near enough, if anything. And THAT'S scary. Life sucks when you don't live up to your own expectations.
But I think I'll stop floating around on that big sea of self-pity now. As I now write this, I'm farther West than I have ever been. I've been in Texas for the first time and by the time I write again tomorrow, I'll have seen the Grand Canyon (and there was much rejoicing). Actually, right now we're approx. 1000 miles from L.A. (ooh, exciting). Ah, but I digress.
We stopped at a mall in Amarillo, TX and were told to be back by 8:30 (Texas time, that is). Laurie, Mike and I were going to eat in the mall but decided (actually, our wallets decided) we'd eat at Burger King across the road. So we had a nice meal and then sat around talking for a while. Then about 8:10 (TX time) we decided to head back. What we didn't realize was taht everyone else had decided they wanted to go to another mall, since the one we'd stopped at was for the most part closed. So as we walked across the ice slickened streets of Amarillo, the bus, filled with all the other students who had be waiting for us to return so they could get to their shopping, drove toward us and picked us up. I had mixed feelings about it. We hadn't done anything wrong. I mean, how were we supposed to know everyone else wanted to blow the joint and that we were holding them up? Yet at the same time I felt guilty for making EVERYONE wait. In fact, I sat in the bus instead of going into the second mall because of it. But I'm still convinced I did nothing wrong. Ah, these pesky moral dilemmas. As I close, I thought I'd let whoever reads this know that Laurie has decided that she will not defecate for the entire month. Should be a L-O-N-G month. Æ
Tunes: shriekback - faded flowers
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
this could be fun...or really, really painful
so fifteen years ago today i went on a trip. mvnc offered j-term classes - basically a semester's work in about three weeks. nice program, especially since it allowed for some great opportunities. one of them was a bike trip down the coast of california, for which you received four college credits - three psych credits for Group Behaviors and one PE credit for Advanced Bicycling.
anyway, part of the class was to keep a journal and so i thought it might be fun, being the fifteenth anniversary of the trip, to let others see what i was like fifteen years ago. i'm afraid to find out how little i've changed. should be interesting. i'll try to label the posts so those of you wanting to avoid them can. i don't imagine they're too long, but they might be a bit painful. we'll see. do keep in mind i was still only 20 years old.
so without further ado, California 1991: Highway One/Wandering Wheels
*************************************
And we're off, goin' to California. To be truly honest, I wasn't as excited as I thought I'd be to leave. I'm not sure why. I feel like I'm on the edge of some large change and to be honest, I'm not sure if it's good or bad. So my trip started with rather mixed emotions. So far the trip has been ratehr uneventful. We left "The Naz" about 1:00 and traveled to Upland, IN and Taylor University. 24 of us traveled and there we met up with 15 from Taylor. There we ate dinner at a place called Ivanhoe's, which supposedly the best food around.
OK, I'll be honest. I started this last night and then we (were) forced to go to sleep and right at this moment the last thing I want to do is write in this journal. I'm feeling like excrement. Sleeping last night was a lot like sleeping in a coffin, for there was about 3" between my nose and the ceiling. Someone said that normally you go to sleep and you don't wake up 'til breakfast. Nnnnnh! Thanks for playing. I woke up every time the bus stopped. So, as stated earlier, I feel like excrement. I alraedy feel like I'm not getting anything out of this and I feel like an irresponsible jerk. Mike is doing much better than I. I'm not soaking it all in enough, not attuning myself to this trip and all it has to offer. I'm not feeling good about myself right now. And to be honest, I'm not sure why. Of course, knowing me, it'll probably change by tonight. Well, we ate breakfast at Catoosa, OK, wh ich means I slept (sorta) through Illinois and Missouri. Bummer. Maybe part of my problem is I look like one of the undead. So far I haven't met too many new people from Taylor yet. Hopefully I'll get a chance sometime soon. I talked to Dennis Bailey for the first time last night. He seemed pretty OK. Hopefully I'll get to know everyone by the end of the trip. Man, I can't get this bandana on. Oh well. Æ
anyway, part of the class was to keep a journal and so i thought it might be fun, being the fifteenth anniversary of the trip, to let others see what i was like fifteen years ago. i'm afraid to find out how little i've changed. should be interesting. i'll try to label the posts so those of you wanting to avoid them can. i don't imagine they're too long, but they might be a bit painful. we'll see. do keep in mind i was still only 20 years old.
so without further ado, California 1991: Highway One/Wandering Wheels
*************************************
And we're off, goin' to California. To be truly honest, I wasn't as excited as I thought I'd be to leave. I'm not sure why. I feel like I'm on the edge of some large change and to be honest, I'm not sure if it's good or bad. So my trip started with rather mixed emotions. So far the trip has been ratehr uneventful. We left "The Naz" about 1:00 and traveled to Upland, IN and Taylor University. 24 of us traveled and there we met up with 15 from Taylor. There we ate dinner at a place called Ivanhoe's, which supposedly the best food around.
OK, I'll be honest. I started this last night and then we (were) forced to go to sleep and right at this moment the last thing I want to do is write in this journal. I'm feeling like excrement. Sleeping last night was a lot like sleeping in a coffin, for there was about 3" between my nose and the ceiling. Someone said that normally you go to sleep and you don't wake up 'til breakfast. Nnnnnh! Thanks for playing. I woke up every time the bus stopped. So, as stated earlier, I feel like excrement. I alraedy feel like I'm not getting anything out of this and I feel like an irresponsible jerk. Mike is doing much better than I. I'm not soaking it all in enough, not attuning myself to this trip and all it has to offer. I'm not feeling good about myself right now. And to be honest, I'm not sure why. Of course, knowing me, it'll probably change by tonight. Well, we ate breakfast at Catoosa, OK, wh ich means I slept (sorta) through Illinois and Missouri. Bummer. Maybe part of my problem is I look like one of the undead. So far I haven't met too many new people from Taylor yet. Hopefully I'll get a chance sometime soon. I talked to Dennis Bailey for the first time last night. He seemed pretty OK. Hopefully I'll get to know everyone by the end of the trip. Man, I can't get this bandana on. Oh well. Æ
Tunes: paul jones - diggin mammas tatters
Monday, January 02, 2006
resolutionless
doesn't feel like a new year. haven't given much thought to resolutions. still not sure what to make of last year.
i am the very model of indecisiveness at the moment.
barely pulled myself out of bed this morning, found my way to school eventually, got enough done to be able to go back and teach tomorrow and may at least have the foundation for what i want to do with IIB when we do short stories. we'll see.
spent the evening at the havens celebrating gina's birthday (which is officially tomorrow, but tonight worked better for all involved). great meal, great company. i still freak josie out, which makes me a little sad. but hey, guess i can't expect to charm all the girls.
5am is going to come far too soon tomorrow.
seems there's not much of significance here tonight.
Æ
i am the very model of indecisiveness at the moment.
barely pulled myself out of bed this morning, found my way to school eventually, got enough done to be able to go back and teach tomorrow and may at least have the foundation for what i want to do with IIB when we do short stories. we'll see.
spent the evening at the havens celebrating gina's birthday (which is officially tomorrow, but tonight worked better for all involved). great meal, great company. i still freak josie out, which makes me a little sad. but hey, guess i can't expect to charm all the girls.
5am is going to come far too soon tomorrow.
seems there's not much of significance here tonight.
Æ
Tunes: honeymoon suite - i got a new girl now
i wonder at my lack of wonder
just back from seeing narnia. i can sum up my experience in two words:
mostly bored.
and this bothers me. i was looking forward to being swept up in the fantasy, the magic of narnia. but i sat there most of the time wondering how much longer it was going to go on. it wasn't a horrible movie, but neither was it magical. i never felt transported outside of this reality.
is that my own failing or that of the film?
obviously others have been transported, others have loved it, others have been swept away.
so it must be me.
i'd like to recapture that sense of wonder, to be overwhelmed again. but this wasn't the film to do it. i even breathed a prayer that God would remove any cynicism from my heart and allow me to enjoy the film as a child would.
i guess His answer was no.
off to bed. up early for prayers, then i should be heading off to school to get set for the coming week. and the rest of the trimester in IIB. still not sure how i'm going to work the short story unit. must be something i can do. i'll think on it tomorrow.
oh, and happy new year, by the way.
Æ
mostly bored.
and this bothers me. i was looking forward to being swept up in the fantasy, the magic of narnia. but i sat there most of the time wondering how much longer it was going to go on. it wasn't a horrible movie, but neither was it magical. i never felt transported outside of this reality.
is that my own failing or that of the film?
obviously others have been transported, others have loved it, others have been swept away.
so it must be me.
i'd like to recapture that sense of wonder, to be overwhelmed again. but this wasn't the film to do it. i even breathed a prayer that God would remove any cynicism from my heart and allow me to enjoy the film as a child would.
i guess His answer was no.
off to bed. up early for prayers, then i should be heading off to school to get set for the coming week. and the rest of the trimester in IIB. still not sure how i'm going to work the short story unit. must be something i can do. i'll think on it tomorrow.
oh, and happy new year, by the way.
Æ
Tunes: don henley - boys of summer
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