Wandering Wheels - 5 January 1991

So much to say, so little time. My was this a full day. And an empty day. First stop today was the Grand Canyon. The scenery on the way in was gorgeous. It;s amazing how beautiful things can be when they're different. We stopped along the South Rim of the canyon to see...and all we saw was fog. The only time I've ever been or may ever be at one of the most beautiful places in the U.S. and I can't see it.

The best part was that we finally got to take showers. Boy, do I feel a lot better now!

Not being able to see the Canyone sort of put a damper on the rest of the day. Here we are again, talking about expectations not being reached. Actually, a lot of this trip so far has been failed expectations, which, of course, means that I probably set my expectations too high. It's hard to write this right now because I'm feeling depressed (again). And I hate myself for it. All I do is whine all the time about what I'm not getting to do, not feeling how I want to. I'm ruining my trip. And even now I'm doing it. Enough.

We got to see an IMAX theater presentation about the Grand Canyon, which was great. At least I got to see the Canyon that way. From there we headed to Las Vegas. On the way, Mike an I wasted Laurie and Ed in euchre, which was amusing. Then, just as I was finishing The Shining, we drove over the Hoover Dam. It was incredible! Hard to believe something man made can look that beautiful The bus stopped on the other side and we all got off the bus. And just then they turned out all the lights! So much for pictures.

So we all jumped ack on the bus and headed to Las Vegas. Coming out of the mountains and seeing all the lights was great. But to be honest I hated Las Vegas. It was so depressing. All the excesses, all the lonely people, all the waste. My head seriously hurt when I was done. As far as groups go, I'm starting to get to know more people, which is nice. However, I feel like I'm alienating myself (being alienated?) from Mike and Laurie. There's that vicious circle again. I'm depressed because I'm not included but I'm not included because I'm depressed. Arrghh! I hate this. you'd think I'd beat this by now. No such luck. Maybe I'll get some insight on this trip. I hope and pray so. Æ

Tunes: luna - new haven comet